"So, what's it like, being a graduate?" Dylan and Brittany both asked me that tonight. My answer? Strange! It hasn't quite set in yet.
This afternoon I tagged along on a run to the feed store with Courtney and Caleb, and Courtney had a gift card to Starbucks from her graduation. Since she doesn't drink coffee, she asked if we wanted to use it. Sure, why not? The Midnight Mint Frappacino is good - tastes like an Andes mint.
Right after we pull out of the drive-thru the van starts danger-zone-level overheating, so we casually wait outside for half an hour for Mom to pick us up. It wasn't too terrible, the weather was nice. And I'm used to waiting on things like that. So it pretty much felt like a normal afternoon.
Job-hunting is a little tiring and confusing. Working on projects - the sportswriting guide and revising the play for David.
Monday, May 22, 2017
Sunday, May 21, 2017
Graduations
Courtney's graduation was yesterday, at First Baptist Broken Arrow. (That's where Elizabeth goes.) There were 23 graduates in total, including Laura, Callie, Marie K. and Carter Fox. A ton of GBC people showed up - Coxes, Mrs. Mix, Lees, Wilsons, Grahams, Buckmasters, DeSpains...probably more than I missed. Dayla and Ashley and their kids came, too. That went fine. Someone's dad looked exactly like Mr. Feeny from Boy Meets World, which I thought was interesting.
It was a much more elaborate graduation than mine was. But they've been working on it for months, so it should be.
We went to the Fergusons' afterparty for Laura once it was over, and that was great. The Coxes and Wilsons were also there, along with Ferguson cousins and Josh and Sara. It felt a lot like Thanksgiving - which is how it always is when visiting them. A little chaotic, sure, simply because there's so many people, but a happy, pleasant chaos. They're just Race of Josephy people, and so they feel like family.. It was great.
The graduates were recognized at church this morning, and that went well. We briefly explained what our plans were, and mine are vague. So....yeah.
Mine was last Saturday, and it was about like the rest of college - panicking, not sure of where to go or what to do once I got there, and then waiting for eons for something to happen. We were arranged in blocks by the divisions the school set up, with no order beyond that. It was "latch onto someone you know" and hang on, moving/exit buddy-style. Since we got there late, I manage to find my line and crash into Jenny, so we stuck together. Cody was right behind me once everyone was situated, and Kinze and Lauren a couple rows back.
Andrew got a good picture of me walking off the stage, and I got a couple with Dr. Mackie on the way out. Also, I got straight A's this semester, the only time that ever happened at RSU. My total GPA was 3.79, so I graduated cum laude. About 300 people graduated overall.
It was a much more elaborate graduation than mine was. But they've been working on it for months, so it should be.
We went to the Fergusons' afterparty for Laura once it was over, and that was great. The Coxes and Wilsons were also there, along with Ferguson cousins and Josh and Sara. It felt a lot like Thanksgiving - which is how it always is when visiting them. A little chaotic, sure, simply because there's so many people, but a happy, pleasant chaos. They're just Race of Josephy people, and so they feel like family.. It was great.
The graduates were recognized at church this morning, and that went well. We briefly explained what our plans were, and mine are vague. So....yeah.
Mine was last Saturday, and it was about like the rest of college - panicking, not sure of where to go or what to do once I got there, and then waiting for eons for something to happen. We were arranged in blocks by the divisions the school set up, with no order beyond that. It was "latch onto someone you know" and hang on, moving/exit buddy-style. Since we got there late, I manage to find my line and crash into Jenny, so we stuck together. Cody was right behind me once everyone was situated, and Kinze and Lauren a couple rows back.
Andrew got a good picture of me walking off the stage, and I got a couple with Dr. Mackie on the way out. Also, I got straight A's this semester, the only time that ever happened at RSU. My total GPA was 3.79, so I graduated cum laude. About 300 people graduated overall.
Friday, May 19, 2017
Parks and Rec Quotes - Season Four, Part One
Recapping the best quotes, quips, descriptions and comebacks from season four of Parks and Recreation. It literally picks up right at the moment where season three ended, so the last scene we saw was at Li'l Sebastian's memorial service afterparty.
Episode One - "I'm Leslie Knope":
"....Wait. What does that mean for you and Ben?" - Ann, after Leslie is asked to run for city council. "I don't know, but I think it's gonna be really bad!" Leslie frowns. "Do you wanna go back to saying 'yay'?" "Yes please!" "Yay!" (Ann is a good friend.)
"So did you get a chance to look at my sample position papers? How do you feel about my stance on Egyptian debt relief?" - Leslie. "Uh....well, it probably won't come up in a local city council election. But....your thoroughness, as always, is impressive." William the Political Manager Guy.
"Aw, Ann - you beautiful sophisticated naive newborn baby...." - Leslie. "...What?" - Ann.
(The office is staring in shock at an email.) "Whoever this is - sent it to every woman in the entire government!" - Leslie howls. "Oh...he's gotta be so embarrassed. I mean, that is a crazy accident." "No, Andy, he did it on purpose!" she snaps. (Sewage Joe is being his normal horrible self again.) Chris and Ben rush into the Parks Department. "Chris! Jerry's making us look at dirty pictures on his computer!" April tattles. "It is exactly because of that lewd photo that I am here. Ben and I are launching a full investigation, and I want to apologize to all the women. And Jerry. If I could go back in time and cut your eyeballs out, I would." "Wow, that is so sweet," April says, looking almost impressed.
"For a female perspective on this scandal, we turn to: a woman!" - Perd Hapley. (He then asks what's happening, she tries to make a joke.) "I do not know what you mean, but, it had the cadence of a joke."
(Leslie snatches phone away from Ben and hangs it up.) "Ben, I need to talk with you." He looks stunned, as only Ben Wyatt can. "...That was my brother. He just had a baby girl-" "That's horrible. Or good. Full disclosure, I didn't listen to whatever it was you just said."
"Wow, you....opposite of broke up with him." "He gave me an eclair, Ann!" Leslie pleads.
"Ron isn't here. His ex-wife Tammy came, and he got scared and ran away," April answers Ron's phone. "...Well, as acting manager of the Parks Department, I declare that everything you are saying is stupid!" Andy then asks for advice. "I don't know what to do," he finishes. "Me neither." she answers, sipping some tea. "You give such great advice! Babe, I love you." (She frowns at camera, noticing it's been following her.) "You're welcome."
(Leslie knocks on the door of Ron's cabin.) "Ron," Leslie says, taken aback by his beard. "What are you doing here?" he growls. "I'm...running away from my problems," she falters. "Come on in."
"All right, enough chitchat. Everybody get back to work!" April hollers. "You are not my boss," - Jerry. "What'd you just say to me?" "Ma'am...." (He scurries away.)
"Given your hunting ability, and my chocolate supplies, I figure we could stay out here for two, three....years?" - Leslie.
"If any of you need anything at all-" Ron addresses the office on his return, "-Too bad. Deal with your problems yourselves. You're adults."
Episode Two - "Ron and Tammys":
(Leslie stutters repeatedly over the word "jail.") "Are you broken?" Ron asks.
Not many notable quotes here.
Episode Three - "Born & Raised":
"Support for Pawnee Community Radio comes the Muriel Fatright Korbel Foudation and SweetumsCares, a nonprofit group that puts umbrella hats on homeless people when it rains," an announcer for WVYS says.
"I wrote a book," Leslie says proudly in an interview segment, holding up her copy of Pawnee: The Greatest Town in America. "The first historical guide to Pawnee. I wrote it as a reference for myself, but then my campaign adviser said we should make it a big wide release. So we had people contribute, we added pictures and we removed a lot of my poems and emotional ramblings and pictures of unicorns and here it is!"
"Usually I only read nautical novels and my own personal manifestos, but I'm proud to make this exception." "Thank you, Ron! I expect all of you to buy additional copies, but I wanted the first copy you own to be delivered - and signed - by me." (April flips through her signed copy.) "This goes on for like, seven pages." "I started thinking about you as a woman, and as a person, and I got carried away." "Okay, mine just says 'Get Well Soon,'" Jerry complains. "Aren't you sick?" "No." (She frowns at him.) "Something's off."
"Do you think there's actually a mistake in here?" April asks Ron. "I doubt it. If there's one thing's Leslie's not, it's sloppy. She's also..." (he flips through the book) "not brief. This is gonna take forever."
"At the risk of bragging, one of the things I'm best at is riding coattails. Behind every successful man is me, smiling and taking partial credit," - Tom.
"Anyone find any mistakes?" Ron tiredly asks Ann and April. "Yeah, actually. In here it says that Pawnee is 'great,' but in reality, it's terrible," April replies. "Let Tom know we haven't found anything." "Hey, I'm thinking of getting a new phone. Do you guys like your phones?" Ann asks, determined to become their friend. "I've never used a phone in my life," April says while texting.
"This feels like gotcha journalism!" Leslie complains on Pawnee Today. "In what way?" Joan Callamezzo asks disinterestedly. Leslie points at the big screen behind them. "In that way. You put 'GOTCHA' in big red letters over my face."
"That was despicable. I am horrified by her tactics. That said, the show was very lively," Chris says after Joan's show finishes filming.
"I could leave," Ann explains in an interview segment. "But I am GOING to get my one minute of small talk, damn it! And it will be CASUAL and AMICABLE!" she yells.
"You're the first one to tell me that 'businesses' need 'customers' to make money." Tom says to Ben, defending himself from reasonable criticism. "I was the first one to tell you that?!" Ben answers, incredulous.
"YOU MIGHT AS WELL GO BACK TO WHERE YOU CAME FROM!" Kerry the Irate Public Meeting Guy yells at a booksigning event. "I AM back where I came from!" Leslie yells back. His response? "THAT SENTENCE WAS CONFUSING!"
"Well, I've made some progress!" Ann tells the camera. "I am up to four seconds with April. And nine second with Ron." (Montage of asking random questions, like where she could find some good new music. April's answer was "The Internet.")
"Eagleton is a town full of rich, snobby jerks. There's a whole chapter about them in my book." - Leslie.
"Wow....that was....as long as it was loud," Ben mumbles his commentary of a drunk Joan Callamezzo's karaoke.
"Everyone in the universe loves a gross medical story. BOOM! I win!" Ann grins. (She finally got their attention by making up a tale about a guy who gets his arm caught in a Pringles can. It's very bloody.)
Everyone eats waffles from JJ's Diner during the office's release party for Leslie's book.
Episode Four - "Pawnee Rangers":
"I've got a question. What do you think of asking Ben to join us today?" Donna asks Tom. It's Treat Yo Self Day, and our introduction to the term. "WHAAAAATTT? NOO!!!! This is our thing!" "But he really seems like he could use a day off. He's like a skinny little rubber band that's about to snap in half." "Exactly. He doesn't know how to relax. Donna, you and I are relaxation professionals! There's no way Ben can slow down enough to keep up with us."
"I don't know how to relax! The sound of harps makes me nervous!" Ben complains while at the spa with Tom and Donna.
"I've taught them well....I've created an army of little Leslie Knope Monsters. I'm so proud! And a little annoyed. But mostly proud," Leslie says during an interview, about the Pawnee Goddesses club after the girls get her to be nice to Ron and his Pawnee Rangers club, which she didn't want to do.
"When did kids get so interested in 'fun'?" Ron asks in perfect seriousness.
Leslie's ad for a new club for Ron to lead to make him feel better - "Are you tough as nails? Would you rather sleep on a bed of pine needles than a mattress? Do you find video games pointless and shopping malls stupid? Do you march to the beat of your own drummer? Did you make the drum yourself? If so, you might just have what it takes to be A Swanson. Pawnee's most hardcore outdoor club starts today."
Episode Five - "Meet and Greet":
"...I take it we're having a party?" Ben asks after walking in to a house full of skeletons and jack-o'lanterns. "Dude! I knew there was somethin' I forgot to tell ya!" Andy grins. Ben then decides that he's going to hide in his room. "If you need me, I'll definitely be awake. Because...you know, I won't be able to sleep, because of the party. So...y'know. All right...bye."
"My family is very non-confrontational. My parents' method of problem-solving is to kind of keep everything bottled up and just subtly hint at what's bothering them. And after thirty-six years, they are still divorced." - Ben.
"Shouldn't my face be on these rugs?" Leslie asks. "It's always been a dream of mine to be on a rug. So, no." "Tom, now is not the time for you to explore your weird dreams."
"You can text without looking at your phone?" Jerry asks Chris incredulously. "I think it's rude not to maintain eye contact with people who are speaking to me," he answers.
"I know I should be chasing your vote, but I stand by my decision to avoid salad and other disgusting things. And I think I have a lot of support in the community for doing that," Leslie tells a group of Pawnee businesspeople.
"In Pawnee, when in doubt? Slam salad!" - Leslie.
"Hi there, is there a project you're working on?" a Lowe's employee asks Ron. "I know more than you." "All right..." the alarmed employee gives up.
"When April and Andy married, I didn't get 'em a wedding present. In my experience, wedding presents are nothing but kindling on the divorce bonfire.But I think I found a way I can really help them make a home." - Ron.
(Ron delivers a heartfelt monologue.) "Are...you okay?" Ann asks. "Great! I'm gonna go around this house and fix everything I can find! You wanna help?" "I really do."
"I have one sister. We steal each other's stuff, hack each other's Twitter accounts, set each other's clothes on fire... There are no rules," April muses.
"We need to deal with what's bothering you," Andy barges into Ben's room. "Oh, please, come into my room..." "See? You're angry at me, and you're not talking about it, and I'm gonna beat you up until you do, because I'm mature." (Andy kicks Ben's chair and begins to beat him up.)
"I grew up with five brothers, and we fought using the Dwyer Method, which was yelling, wrestling, crying, followed by lots of hugs. And then more wrestling, but the fun kind, and then more crying, when the fun kind of wrestling got out of hand." "Um....can you....let me go?" Ben asks, in chokehold. "Not til you tell me what's wrong!"
"I'd say you got the handle on that torque wrench," Ron says approvingly to Ann. "Yeah, well, the flange was a little warped, so I just goosed it with a triple-three boltsmack." "That was nonsense." "I know, but it's so fun to talk like that!" (He hands her toolbox.) "Here. Keep this. You earned it."
"Does it hurt?" Ben asks Andy. "Yeah, man! You broke my nose! But I don't even care anymore. Just get it all out there. Go." "All right.... Maybe you have to start thinking about how your actions affect me? Like, tell me about stuff happening at the house. Stop referring to my bedroom as a common space. Stop using my comforter for your pillow forts. Just...respect me." "Absolutely!"
"Tom Haverford is a selfish, unctuous, sleazy, self-promoting, good-hearted, secretly-kind-and-wonderful tiny little person." - Leslie.
Episode Six - "End of the World":
"For a while in the 1970's, our town was run by a freaky cult," Leslie explains. "Every few years, the remaining members of the cult predict the world's gonna end. And they have an all-night vigil in the park.It's super annoying."
"Tonight the followers of Reasonableism will be joining together to await the return of Zorp, the giant lizard god who will destroy the earth with his cleansing fire of judgement. Also, light refreshments will be served," Leslie said during a department meeting.
"Why does the cult call themselves the Reasonableists?" Chris asks. "Well, they figured that if people criticize them, it'll seem like they're attacking something very reasonable," Leslie answers. "That's...weirdly brilliant..." Ben muses.
"Headline idea: 'It's the End of the World as They Know It, But Pawnee Feels Fine.'" - Leslie. "It's a little long." - Shauna Mulway-Tweep. "Okay. How about 'Zorp Schmorp, Doomsday Prediction Falls Flat as Citizens Spend Pleasant Evening Enjoying One of Pawnee's Finest Parks'?" "Somehow, longer..." Shauna then asks if Ben is single, Leslie awkwardly stumbles all over herself trying to answer that question, and Shauna wanders over to Ben. "What's happening?" Ann asks. "The world is ending."
"Can I speak with you about a personal matter?" Leslie asks Ron. "Normally, no. But given that there's only twenty minutes until the end of human existence, also no."
"What's wrong?" Lucy asks Tom. "I don't know....after this is done I'm gonna be broke and I'm not gonna have a job...." "Well, if it's any consolation, this is honestly the best party I have ever been to." (She kisses him.) Tom is stunned for a minute, then he grins at the cameras. "You saw that. You saw that too!"
(Andy and April arrive at the Grand Canyon) "It's so much more beautiful than I ever could have imagined." "Yeah....I'm trying to find a way to be annoyed by it, but I'm comin' up empty."
Episode Seven - "The Treaty":
"I need a few more volunteers. Andy, will you be Iceland?" - Leslie's planning the Pawnee Central Model UN Meetings. "The bad guys from Mighty Ducks 2? Don't think so." "How 'bout Japan?" "The bad guys from Karate Kid II? Even worse. How about Germany? They've never been the bad guys." "Why don't you be Finland." "Okay." "And I'll be the Moon," April says sarcastically. "You're gonna be South Africa or....Pakistan." "I'm the Moon or I quit!" "April." "Moon or quit, man." "Fine. You be South Africa and you can also secretly run the Moon." "The Moon accepts your ridiculous proposal."
"Uh, no, Leslie and I aren't dating any longer, but, uh...we're friends. So, uh...it's fun. It's just fun. It's fun... It's...fun - It is fun." At this point Ben silently pleads for help from the cameraman.
"Sometimes your relentless cheeriness is confusing," Ann tells Chris.
"I just wanted to say...that I thought it was really cool how everything fell apart in there," April tells Leslie, who is despondent in the hallway. "and also, maybe you should talk to Ben." "No. He's being a jerk." "Please? When Ben gets upset he becomes a really bad roommate. He takes really long sadness baths and makes me late for stuff." "I hate it here. I can't wait to graduate." (April grins.) "Yeah, but summer's gonna totally kick ass."
Episode One - "I'm Leslie Knope":
"....Wait. What does that mean for you and Ben?" - Ann, after Leslie is asked to run for city council. "I don't know, but I think it's gonna be really bad!" Leslie frowns. "Do you wanna go back to saying 'yay'?" "Yes please!" "Yay!" (Ann is a good friend.)
"So did you get a chance to look at my sample position papers? How do you feel about my stance on Egyptian debt relief?" - Leslie. "Uh....well, it probably won't come up in a local city council election. But....your thoroughness, as always, is impressive." William the Political Manager Guy.
"Aw, Ann - you beautiful sophisticated naive newborn baby...." - Leslie. "...What?" - Ann.
(The office is staring in shock at an email.) "Whoever this is - sent it to every woman in the entire government!" - Leslie howls. "Oh...he's gotta be so embarrassed. I mean, that is a crazy accident." "No, Andy, he did it on purpose!" she snaps. (Sewage Joe is being his normal horrible self again.) Chris and Ben rush into the Parks Department. "Chris! Jerry's making us look at dirty pictures on his computer!" April tattles. "It is exactly because of that lewd photo that I am here. Ben and I are launching a full investigation, and I want to apologize to all the women. And Jerry. If I could go back in time and cut your eyeballs out, I would." "Wow, that is so sweet," April says, looking almost impressed.
"For a female perspective on this scandal, we turn to: a woman!" - Perd Hapley. (He then asks what's happening, she tries to make a joke.) "I do not know what you mean, but, it had the cadence of a joke."
(Leslie snatches phone away from Ben and hangs it up.) "Ben, I need to talk with you." He looks stunned, as only Ben Wyatt can. "...That was my brother. He just had a baby girl-" "That's horrible. Or good. Full disclosure, I didn't listen to whatever it was you just said."
"Wow, you....opposite of broke up with him." "He gave me an eclair, Ann!" Leslie pleads.
"Ron isn't here. His ex-wife Tammy came, and he got scared and ran away," April answers Ron's phone. "...Well, as acting manager of the Parks Department, I declare that everything you are saying is stupid!" Andy then asks for advice. "I don't know what to do," he finishes. "Me neither." she answers, sipping some tea. "You give such great advice! Babe, I love you." (She frowns at camera, noticing it's been following her.) "You're welcome."
(Leslie knocks on the door of Ron's cabin.) "Ron," Leslie says, taken aback by his beard. "What are you doing here?" he growls. "I'm...running away from my problems," she falters. "Come on in."
"All right, enough chitchat. Everybody get back to work!" April hollers. "You are not my boss," - Jerry. "What'd you just say to me?" "Ma'am...." (He scurries away.)
"Given your hunting ability, and my chocolate supplies, I figure we could stay out here for two, three....years?" - Leslie.
"If any of you need anything at all-" Ron addresses the office on his return, "-Too bad. Deal with your problems yourselves. You're adults."
Episode Two - "Ron and Tammys":
(Leslie stutters repeatedly over the word "jail.") "Are you broken?" Ron asks.
Not many notable quotes here.
Episode Three - "Born & Raised":
"Support for Pawnee Community Radio comes the Muriel Fatright Korbel Foudation and SweetumsCares, a nonprofit group that puts umbrella hats on homeless people when it rains," an announcer for WVYS says.
"I wrote a book," Leslie says proudly in an interview segment, holding up her copy of Pawnee: The Greatest Town in America. "The first historical guide to Pawnee. I wrote it as a reference for myself, but then my campaign adviser said we should make it a big wide release. So we had people contribute, we added pictures and we removed a lot of my poems and emotional ramblings and pictures of unicorns and here it is!"
"Usually I only read nautical novels and my own personal manifestos, but I'm proud to make this exception." "Thank you, Ron! I expect all of you to buy additional copies, but I wanted the first copy you own to be delivered - and signed - by me." (April flips through her signed copy.) "This goes on for like, seven pages." "I started thinking about you as a woman, and as a person, and I got carried away." "Okay, mine just says 'Get Well Soon,'" Jerry complains. "Aren't you sick?" "No." (She frowns at him.) "Something's off."
"Do you think there's actually a mistake in here?" April asks Ron. "I doubt it. If there's one thing's Leslie's not, it's sloppy. She's also..." (he flips through the book) "not brief. This is gonna take forever."
"At the risk of bragging, one of the things I'm best at is riding coattails. Behind every successful man is me, smiling and taking partial credit," - Tom.
"Anyone find any mistakes?" Ron tiredly asks Ann and April. "Yeah, actually. In here it says that Pawnee is 'great,' but in reality, it's terrible," April replies. "Let Tom know we haven't found anything." "Hey, I'm thinking of getting a new phone. Do you guys like your phones?" Ann asks, determined to become their friend. "I've never used a phone in my life," April says while texting.
"This feels like gotcha journalism!" Leslie complains on Pawnee Today. "In what way?" Joan Callamezzo asks disinterestedly. Leslie points at the big screen behind them. "In that way. You put 'GOTCHA' in big red letters over my face."
"That was despicable. I am horrified by her tactics. That said, the show was very lively," Chris says after Joan's show finishes filming.
"I could leave," Ann explains in an interview segment. "But I am GOING to get my one minute of small talk, damn it! And it will be CASUAL and AMICABLE!" she yells.
"You're the first one to tell me that 'businesses' need 'customers' to make money." Tom says to Ben, defending himself from reasonable criticism. "I was the first one to tell you that?!" Ben answers, incredulous.
"YOU MIGHT AS WELL GO BACK TO WHERE YOU CAME FROM!" Kerry the Irate Public Meeting Guy yells at a booksigning event. "I AM back where I came from!" Leslie yells back. His response? "THAT SENTENCE WAS CONFUSING!"
"Well, I've made some progress!" Ann tells the camera. "I am up to four seconds with April. And nine second with Ron." (Montage of asking random questions, like where she could find some good new music. April's answer was "The Internet.")
"Eagleton is a town full of rich, snobby jerks. There's a whole chapter about them in my book." - Leslie.
"Wow....that was....as long as it was loud," Ben mumbles his commentary of a drunk Joan Callamezzo's karaoke.
"Everyone in the universe loves a gross medical story. BOOM! I win!" Ann grins. (She finally got their attention by making up a tale about a guy who gets his arm caught in a Pringles can. It's very bloody.)
Everyone eats waffles from JJ's Diner during the office's release party for Leslie's book.
Episode Four - "Pawnee Rangers":
"I've got a question. What do you think of asking Ben to join us today?" Donna asks Tom. It's Treat Yo Self Day, and our introduction to the term. "WHAAAAATTT? NOO!!!! This is our thing!" "But he really seems like he could use a day off. He's like a skinny little rubber band that's about to snap in half." "Exactly. He doesn't know how to relax. Donna, you and I are relaxation professionals! There's no way Ben can slow down enough to keep up with us."
"I don't know how to relax! The sound of harps makes me nervous!" Ben complains while at the spa with Tom and Donna.
"I've taught them well....I've created an army of little Leslie Knope Monsters. I'm so proud! And a little annoyed. But mostly proud," Leslie says during an interview, about the Pawnee Goddesses club after the girls get her to be nice to Ron and his Pawnee Rangers club, which she didn't want to do.
"When did kids get so interested in 'fun'?" Ron asks in perfect seriousness.
Leslie's ad for a new club for Ron to lead to make him feel better - "Are you tough as nails? Would you rather sleep on a bed of pine needles than a mattress? Do you find video games pointless and shopping malls stupid? Do you march to the beat of your own drummer? Did you make the drum yourself? If so, you might just have what it takes to be A Swanson. Pawnee's most hardcore outdoor club starts today."
Episode Five - "Meet and Greet":
"...I take it we're having a party?" Ben asks after walking in to a house full of skeletons and jack-o'lanterns. "Dude! I knew there was somethin' I forgot to tell ya!" Andy grins. Ben then decides that he's going to hide in his room. "If you need me, I'll definitely be awake. Because...you know, I won't be able to sleep, because of the party. So...y'know. All right...bye."
"My family is very non-confrontational. My parents' method of problem-solving is to kind of keep everything bottled up and just subtly hint at what's bothering them. And after thirty-six years, they are still divorced." - Ben.
"Shouldn't my face be on these rugs?" Leslie asks. "It's always been a dream of mine to be on a rug. So, no." "Tom, now is not the time for you to explore your weird dreams."
"You can text without looking at your phone?" Jerry asks Chris incredulously. "I think it's rude not to maintain eye contact with people who are speaking to me," he answers.
"I know I should be chasing your vote, but I stand by my decision to avoid salad and other disgusting things. And I think I have a lot of support in the community for doing that," Leslie tells a group of Pawnee businesspeople.
"In Pawnee, when in doubt? Slam salad!" - Leslie.
"Hi there, is there a project you're working on?" a Lowe's employee asks Ron. "I know more than you." "All right..." the alarmed employee gives up.
"When April and Andy married, I didn't get 'em a wedding present. In my experience, wedding presents are nothing but kindling on the divorce bonfire.But I think I found a way I can really help them make a home." - Ron.
(Ron delivers a heartfelt monologue.) "Are...you okay?" Ann asks. "Great! I'm gonna go around this house and fix everything I can find! You wanna help?" "I really do."
"I have one sister. We steal each other's stuff, hack each other's Twitter accounts, set each other's clothes on fire... There are no rules," April muses.
"We need to deal with what's bothering you," Andy barges into Ben's room. "Oh, please, come into my room..." "See? You're angry at me, and you're not talking about it, and I'm gonna beat you up until you do, because I'm mature." (Andy kicks Ben's chair and begins to beat him up.)
"I grew up with five brothers, and we fought using the Dwyer Method, which was yelling, wrestling, crying, followed by lots of hugs. And then more wrestling, but the fun kind, and then more crying, when the fun kind of wrestling got out of hand." "Um....can you....let me go?" Ben asks, in chokehold. "Not til you tell me what's wrong!"
"I'd say you got the handle on that torque wrench," Ron says approvingly to Ann. "Yeah, well, the flange was a little warped, so I just goosed it with a triple-three boltsmack." "That was nonsense." "I know, but it's so fun to talk like that!" (He hands her toolbox.) "Here. Keep this. You earned it."
"Does it hurt?" Ben asks Andy. "Yeah, man! You broke my nose! But I don't even care anymore. Just get it all out there. Go." "All right.... Maybe you have to start thinking about how your actions affect me? Like, tell me about stuff happening at the house. Stop referring to my bedroom as a common space. Stop using my comforter for your pillow forts. Just...respect me." "Absolutely!"
"Tom Haverford is a selfish, unctuous, sleazy, self-promoting, good-hearted, secretly-kind-and-wonderful tiny little person." - Leslie.
Episode Six - "End of the World":
"For a while in the 1970's, our town was run by a freaky cult," Leslie explains. "Every few years, the remaining members of the cult predict the world's gonna end. And they have an all-night vigil in the park.It's super annoying."
"Tonight the followers of Reasonableism will be joining together to await the return of Zorp, the giant lizard god who will destroy the earth with his cleansing fire of judgement. Also, light refreshments will be served," Leslie said during a department meeting.
"Why does the cult call themselves the Reasonableists?" Chris asks. "Well, they figured that if people criticize them, it'll seem like they're attacking something very reasonable," Leslie answers. "That's...weirdly brilliant..." Ben muses.
"Headline idea: 'It's the End of the World as They Know It, But Pawnee Feels Fine.'" - Leslie. "It's a little long." - Shauna Mulway-Tweep. "Okay. How about 'Zorp Schmorp, Doomsday Prediction Falls Flat as Citizens Spend Pleasant Evening Enjoying One of Pawnee's Finest Parks'?" "Somehow, longer..." Shauna then asks if Ben is single, Leslie awkwardly stumbles all over herself trying to answer that question, and Shauna wanders over to Ben. "What's happening?" Ann asks. "The world is ending."
"Can I speak with you about a personal matter?" Leslie asks Ron. "Normally, no. But given that there's only twenty minutes until the end of human existence, also no."
"What's wrong?" Lucy asks Tom. "I don't know....after this is done I'm gonna be broke and I'm not gonna have a job...." "Well, if it's any consolation, this is honestly the best party I have ever been to." (She kisses him.) Tom is stunned for a minute, then he grins at the cameras. "You saw that. You saw that too!"
(Andy and April arrive at the Grand Canyon) "It's so much more beautiful than I ever could have imagined." "Yeah....I'm trying to find a way to be annoyed by it, but I'm comin' up empty."
Episode Seven - "The Treaty":
"I need a few more volunteers. Andy, will you be Iceland?" - Leslie's planning the Pawnee Central Model UN Meetings. "The bad guys from Mighty Ducks 2? Don't think so." "How 'bout Japan?" "The bad guys from Karate Kid II? Even worse. How about Germany? They've never been the bad guys." "Why don't you be Finland." "Okay." "And I'll be the Moon," April says sarcastically. "You're gonna be South Africa or....Pakistan." "I'm the Moon or I quit!" "April." "Moon or quit, man." "Fine. You be South Africa and you can also secretly run the Moon." "The Moon accepts your ridiculous proposal."
"Uh, no, Leslie and I aren't dating any longer, but, uh...we're friends. So, uh...it's fun. It's just fun. It's fun... It's...fun - It is fun." At this point Ben silently pleads for help from the cameraman.
"Sometimes your relentless cheeriness is confusing," Ann tells Chris.
"I just wanted to say...that I thought it was really cool how everything fell apart in there," April tells Leslie, who is despondent in the hallway. "and also, maybe you should talk to Ben." "No. He's being a jerk." "Please? When Ben gets upset he becomes a really bad roommate. He takes really long sadness baths and makes me late for stuff." "I hate it here. I can't wait to graduate." (April grins.) "Yeah, but summer's gonna totally kick ass."
Thursday, May 18, 2017
Thanks
The acknowledgements are one of the best overlooked parts of books, because while writing is a solitary act, the creation of a book involves a lot of time and a lot of people. So does getting through college. There are far more people who ought to be on this list, probably, but it's been a (very long) journey full of twists and turns and rocky places, so I can't remember everything.
First, thanks to Mom and Dad, Courtney, Caleb, Trevor and Amy. You guys are awesome. And thanks to Grandpa and Robbie for being there while I was in Tahlequah. And Harry and Louise, and Nano, for being themselves.
Thanks Ashland, Amanda, Daniel, Dylan, Jessica and Jon, for your friendship, prayers and encouragement throughout this whole process, for being there to listen when necessary, tease incessantly or trade insults or excited movie-news speculation with, get advice from or work with on projects.
First, thanks to Mom and Dad, Courtney, Caleb, Trevor and Amy. You guys are awesome. And thanks to Grandpa and Robbie for being there while I was in Tahlequah. And Harry and Louise, and Nano, for being themselves.
Thanks Ashland, Amanda, Daniel, Dylan, Jessica and Jon, for your friendship, prayers and encouragement throughout this whole process, for being there to listen when necessary, tease incessantly or trade insults or excited movie-news speculation with, get advice from or work with on projects.
Thanks to the GBC people who prayed for me throughout the journey, particularly Steven and Jamie, Scotty, the Gundersens, Fergusons, Steeleys, Wilsons and Dugas. I'm sure there are lots of others, too.
Thanks to fellow SGYC counselors like Brother Larry, Miss Kathy, Mrs. Boyer and Ryan, for their caring about the kids. Plus they're all good to work with. Grateful for friends made at camp that I still hear from once in a while, like Derek and Shari.
Thanks to Alton and Maddie for offering encouragement about life at key times, and outside-of-school writing pals Cassie, Julie, Mrs. Curtis and Mrs. Hollis.
Thanks to fellow SGYC counselors like Brother Larry, Miss Kathy, Mrs. Boyer and Ryan, for their caring about the kids. Plus they're all good to work with. Grateful for friends made at camp that I still hear from once in a while, like Derek and Shari.
Thanks to Alton and Maddie for offering encouragement about life at key times, and outside-of-school writing pals Cassie, Julie, Mrs. Curtis and Mrs. Hollis.
Thanks to Sport, Sunny and Copper, for being great dogs, and Sunny and Copper for helping me get through that first year. Thank you, Rags, for being a fantastic cat, and helping me get through the rest.
Thanks, Josh, for helping get through freshman year. Congrats to you and Sara on the wedding in a couple weeks!
Thanks, Sam, for helping me get through that first semester.
Thanks, Mallory and Cheyenne, for always being ready to joke about how awful Deiter's horrendous Comp I class was.
Thanks, Mallory and Cheyenne, for always being ready to joke about how awful Deiter's horrendous Comp I class was.
Thanks, Bob and Deb, for showing what following Christ looks like in your lives, in your marriage and in your ministry while leading the NSU BCM.
Thanks to the SWAT crew, particularly Samantha, Elizabeth, Susan, Jacob, Ja Li Si and James. It was fantastic to work with you guys, and I appreciate your friendship so much. Other BCM people who should go here: Daniel P., Annie, James Hoover, Stephen, Zach, Jocelyn, Bucky, Amber, Ashleigh, TJ and Drew. All of y'all also brightened up sophomore year quite a bit, whether that be working on the worship team, Bible studies, vollleyball/basketball, or planning miscellanous things like the Friday Lunch Bunch gatherings or Thunder watch parties. Finally, a special shoutout to Elizabeth, Stephen, Daniel P., Bucky, and Mom for introducing me to the residents of Pawnee, Indiana. (In other words, for getting me hooked on Parks and Recreation.)
Thanks, Randall and Lacey, for your efforts leading RSU Chi Alpha, and showing how a young couple can serve Christ through their marriage and ministry.
At NSU - Thanks to Cassie and Dr. Eversole for teaching in the MassComm/Media Studies department, and to Professor Semrow and Dr. Faulds in the English Department.
Thanks, Randall and Lacey, for your efforts leading RSU Chi Alpha, and showing how a young couple can serve Christ through their marriage and ministry.
At NSU - Thanks to Cassie and Dr. Eversole for teaching in the MassComm/Media Studies department, and to Professor Semrow and Dr. Faulds in the English Department.
Thanks to the Galdemezes and DeSpains for being there when needed, and allowing me to feel like part of y'all's families - including crashing the couch and raiding the library.
At RSU - Thanks to Dr. Mackie, Dr. Dial-Driver, Dr. Marrero, Mr. Williams, Tip and David for loving your subjects, and being amazing teachers. Thanks especially to Dr. Mackie for explaining how to write poetry, and to Dr. Mackie and Dr. Dial-Driver for trying to teach me how to use an academic tone in essays. Thanks to David for teaching scriptwriting and directing theater projects, and all three of them for encouraging me to keep writing.
Thanks, Brittany. It was great to work with you and spend time with you this semester
Thanks to Cody, Kinze, Lauren, Brian, Coale, Debra and Jenny for being frequent classmates/coworkers/friends. It's a privilege to work with you guys, whatever that work might entail - acting, writing stories/poetry/nonfiction/essays/stage plays/screenplays/radio copy, arguing with each other about edits in our work or about the merits of works studied, mutual panicking over deadlines, whatever. Hopefully our paths will cross again someday.
Thanks for Youth Tour pals for understanding what college life is like, and being willing to laugh along in gladness or sympathy with one another's triumphs and trials. Adam, Lorene, Ravi and Tauri immediately leap to mind, but I know there are others, too, from that trip. It's been really cool how most of us have kept in touch over the years.
In short....
Thanks, Brittany. It was great to work with you and spend time with you this semester
Thanks to Cody, Kinze, Lauren, Brian, Coale, Debra and Jenny for being frequent classmates/coworkers/friends. It's a privilege to work with you guys, whatever that work might entail - acting, writing stories/poetry/nonfiction/essays/stage plays/screenplays/radio copy, arguing with each other about edits in our work or about the merits of works studied, mutual panicking over deadlines, whatever. Hopefully our paths will cross again someday.
Thanks for Youth Tour pals for understanding what college life is like, and being willing to laugh along in gladness or sympathy with one another's triumphs and trials. Adam, Lorene, Ravi and Tauri immediately leap to mind, but I know there are others, too, from that trip. It's been really cool how most of us have kept in touch over the years.
In short....
Thursday, May 11, 2017
Finals Week in Review
Time for a recap of this week, I suppose. It's Caleb's birthday, I think they went to the climbing gym, which is a blast. I spent most of yesterday packing. And last night was full of hymns for some reason, which is always nice. Sometimes you aren't exactly sure what words to pray, so you have to sing instead.
Monday afternoon was the Psych final, and Dr. Marrero walks in holding a piece of paper. "I've got the current grades right here," he says. "If you like yours, you can walk right out of here right now and that'll be what I enter into the system."
I had a 91.5, which equates to an A, so I gratefully bolted. "Meep meep!" I chirped, Roadrunner-like, as a smoke trail followed me out of Baird Hall.
It wasn't quite an all-nighter Monday night, but close. I had an essay due for Gothic Film and Lit, and an origami picture book to write/draw for Pop Market Tuesday morning. It was titled THIS Is How You Do That: The Essential Top Secret Survival Manual, complete with a copyright page and back-cover blurbs from famous people. For the blurbs, I mainly used characters that I've played - Matt Kojak, of course, is the host of the game show Go With the Flow, from our SWAT skits. Tyler Crickenburg, from Tent City, became a cable-celebrity dog trainer. And Nicole Martin, better known to her friends as Soda, is a novelist from my fiction, main character in a couple novels. (Her siblings are recurring characters in short stories.) About half the class listed the book in their favorites, which I was happy about. Coale said in his critique, "Nobody else but Wesley would even try coming at this project from this angle, much less pull it off so well. I loved it, made me smile." If I can think of enough examples, I'm going to keep working with this idea. The other half of our Pop Market final was a short story, and I was blank on good ideas. So I just condensed and tweaked part of the Panthers soccer story I wrote a couple years ago. I'm still planning on expanding that one, because it's such an awkward size right now at 9,000 words.
Dr. Mackie said my essay last week on the characteristics of Southern Gothic lit was one of the better papers I've done while here, which is good.
Dr. Dial-Driver ordered pizza and we had lunch during Capstone as our "final"; it was a good time to just hang out with everyone for a bit, though there were several comments of the "I feel like I'm forgetting iimportant homework of some kind" variety. Sitcoms were discussed, and we all listened attentively to weird Dial-Driver stories. Afterwards Lauren and I went treasure hunting through Dr. Mackie's piles of giveaway books in the office, where I found a collection of Hemingway's early short stories.
In TV news, ABC is bringing American Idol back next year (SQUEAL OF EXCITEMENT AND PULSATING GUITAR STRINGS). So....yeahhh, I might be a little excited about that. (Or still mad that I missed the apparently-series finale last spring.) So there's still a chance that I could try out. Also, Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. was renewed for a fifth season this afternoon, which is really awesome. (The cast's acting ability is amazing - Mallory Jansen was the highlight this week, depicting the torrent of Ophelia's turbulent emotions.) Called Trevor afterwards, and we talked about the episode for about 45 minutes.
Helped out with the Chi Alpha pancake feast Tuesday and Wednesday nights at the Assembly of God, held in their gym, Tuesday night I worked as a server of meals, mixer of juice and chopper of bananas, while Wednesday night I was mainly behind the bacon grill.
Could never fall asleep Tuesday night, which was frustrating. But I was able to take an hour-long nap Wednesday afternoon.
The conference finals of the NHL playoffs are set - in the Eastern Conference it'll be the Ottawa Senators against the Pittsburgh Penguins, while the Western Conference will be claimed by either the Anaheim Ducks or the Nashville Predators. I'd really like a Canadian team to win the Cup, since it is their trophy and all, and they haven't won since Montreal in 1993. So for that reason I like Ottawa. But if we're going by jersey design, that'd be the Penguins, and then Carrie Underwood's husband Mike Fisher is captain of the Predators. And then the Ducks - hey, they're the Ducks. QUACK QUACK QUACK!
Hung out with Brittany this morning, which was cool. Crashed the Directing final this afternoon, because she'd suggested it several weeks ago. And also it was a way of supporting her efforts in that class, and Coale's, too. Plus it was a way to be encouraging to David, showing up to an even-more-niche-than-usual RSU Theater project - even one audience member is better than nothing. Brittany and Coale did well, both in directing their pieces and acting in other people's.
Everyone adapted the opening scene of Sophocles' Oedipus Rex, mostly sticking with the actual text, the way Joss Whedon's Much Ado does. (This opening scene is where the audience hears the prophecy about the imminent destruction of Thebes.) They were staged readings, since it was a class. There were a couple press conferences, while other scenes crafted it as coffee-shop gossip.or a conversation between stoners. Halfway through, however, a tornado warning was declared for Rogers County, and the sirens began wailing. Since the auditorium basement is one of the two shelters on campus, a never-ending stream of random people kept streaming through the doors and interrupting the scenes. But the show must go on, so the actors continued on anyway. It's an Oklahoma thing - weather is part of living, and unless it's necessary, life goes on as usual during a storm.
"Hey, remember that Texaco play you wrote about a year ago?" David asks me during while the actors are doing final troubleshooting rehearsal just before they got started. I remember it, sure, because I was proud of that one. (That usually doesn't happen with creative projects.) But I haven't had much time to work on it since, other than translating it into prose. "Okay, do you think you could revise it over the summer? I want to do an Original Recipe [program] for fall, but written by alumni. And I know you write well." So that'll be a project to work on coming up.
Today's "Article to Make the Reader Go 'Hmm...'" is from The Atlantic, trying to match social media sites with the Seven Deadly Sins.
I graduated from high school five years ago tomorrow.
Monday afternoon was the Psych final, and Dr. Marrero walks in holding a piece of paper. "I've got the current grades right here," he says. "If you like yours, you can walk right out of here right now and that'll be what I enter into the system."
I had a 91.5, which equates to an A, so I gratefully bolted. "Meep meep!" I chirped, Roadrunner-like, as a smoke trail followed me out of Baird Hall.
It wasn't quite an all-nighter Monday night, but close. I had an essay due for Gothic Film and Lit, and an origami picture book to write/draw for Pop Market Tuesday morning. It was titled THIS Is How You Do That: The Essential Top Secret Survival Manual, complete with a copyright page and back-cover blurbs from famous people. For the blurbs, I mainly used characters that I've played - Matt Kojak, of course, is the host of the game show Go With the Flow, from our SWAT skits. Tyler Crickenburg, from Tent City, became a cable-celebrity dog trainer. And Nicole Martin, better known to her friends as Soda, is a novelist from my fiction, main character in a couple novels. (Her siblings are recurring characters in short stories.) About half the class listed the book in their favorites, which I was happy about. Coale said in his critique, "Nobody else but Wesley would even try coming at this project from this angle, much less pull it off so well. I loved it, made me smile." If I can think of enough examples, I'm going to keep working with this idea. The other half of our Pop Market final was a short story, and I was blank on good ideas. So I just condensed and tweaked part of the Panthers soccer story I wrote a couple years ago. I'm still planning on expanding that one, because it's such an awkward size right now at 9,000 words.
Dr. Mackie said my essay last week on the characteristics of Southern Gothic lit was one of the better papers I've done while here, which is good.
Dr. Dial-Driver ordered pizza and we had lunch during Capstone as our "final"; it was a good time to just hang out with everyone for a bit, though there were several comments of the "I feel like I'm forgetting iimportant homework of some kind" variety. Sitcoms were discussed, and we all listened attentively to weird Dial-Driver stories. Afterwards Lauren and I went treasure hunting through Dr. Mackie's piles of giveaway books in the office, where I found a collection of Hemingway's early short stories.
In TV news, ABC is bringing American Idol back next year (SQUEAL OF EXCITEMENT AND PULSATING GUITAR STRINGS). So....yeahhh, I might be a little excited about that. (Or still mad that I missed the apparently-series finale last spring.) So there's still a chance that I could try out. Also, Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. was renewed for a fifth season this afternoon, which is really awesome. (The cast's acting ability is amazing - Mallory Jansen was the highlight this week, depicting the torrent of Ophelia's turbulent emotions.) Called Trevor afterwards, and we talked about the episode for about 45 minutes.
Helped out with the Chi Alpha pancake feast Tuesday and Wednesday nights at the Assembly of God, held in their gym, Tuesday night I worked as a server of meals, mixer of juice and chopper of bananas, while Wednesday night I was mainly behind the bacon grill.
Could never fall asleep Tuesday night, which was frustrating. But I was able to take an hour-long nap Wednesday afternoon.
The conference finals of the NHL playoffs are set - in the Eastern Conference it'll be the Ottawa Senators against the Pittsburgh Penguins, while the Western Conference will be claimed by either the Anaheim Ducks or the Nashville Predators. I'd really like a Canadian team to win the Cup, since it is their trophy and all, and they haven't won since Montreal in 1993. So for that reason I like Ottawa. But if we're going by jersey design, that'd be the Penguins, and then Carrie Underwood's husband Mike Fisher is captain of the Predators. And then the Ducks - hey, they're the Ducks. QUACK QUACK QUACK!
Hung out with Brittany this morning, which was cool. Crashed the Directing final this afternoon, because she'd suggested it several weeks ago. And also it was a way of supporting her efforts in that class, and Coale's, too. Plus it was a way to be encouraging to David, showing up to an even-more-niche-than-usual RSU Theater project - even one audience member is better than nothing. Brittany and Coale did well, both in directing their pieces and acting in other people's.
Everyone adapted the opening scene of Sophocles' Oedipus Rex, mostly sticking with the actual text, the way Joss Whedon's Much Ado does. (This opening scene is where the audience hears the prophecy about the imminent destruction of Thebes.) They were staged readings, since it was a class. There were a couple press conferences, while other scenes crafted it as coffee-shop gossip.or a conversation between stoners. Halfway through, however, a tornado warning was declared for Rogers County, and the sirens began wailing. Since the auditorium basement is one of the two shelters on campus, a never-ending stream of random people kept streaming through the doors and interrupting the scenes. But the show must go on, so the actors continued on anyway. It's an Oklahoma thing - weather is part of living, and unless it's necessary, life goes on as usual during a storm.
"Hey, remember that Texaco play you wrote about a year ago?" David asks me during while the actors are doing final troubleshooting rehearsal just before they got started. I remember it, sure, because I was proud of that one. (That usually doesn't happen with creative projects.) But I haven't had much time to work on it since, other than translating it into prose. "Okay, do you think you could revise it over the summer? I want to do an Original Recipe [program] for fall, but written by alumni. And I know you write well." So that'll be a project to work on coming up.
Today's "Article to Make the Reader Go 'Hmm...'" is from The Atlantic, trying to match social media sites with the Seven Deadly Sins.
I graduated from high school five years ago tomorrow.
Wednesday, May 10, 2017
Overheard in the Classroom, Spring 2017
This is the fourth or so of a series of strange quips overheard in classrooms, mostly without context because that would zap the humor out of them. There weren't that many humorous quips this semester, mainly because we were working with a lot of serious material - most Capstone class reading selections dealt with slow death and torture, Dr. Marrero's psych class was studying serial killers and a variety of other lowlifes, and Gothic lit is heavy. (Besides, me, Kenzie and Dr. Mackie could only think of so much to say about the works between the three of us.)
I found this one while going through old notebooks to see what I could throw out, from 3-25-13, in Comp II -
Someone mentions Taylor Swift during class. "Who's Taylor Swift?" our graduate-assistant teacher Jason asks in all seriousness.
1-17-17, Creative Writing for the Popular Market -
"Text in class, I'll eat your phone." - Dr. Dial-Driver.
1-21-17, Pop Market -
"Aah!" Dr. Dial-Driver yelps. "I have errant coffee!" Her drink had spilled.
1-25-17, Psychopathology of the Criminal Mind -
Apparently lions and hyenas naturally loathe each other.
1-30-17, Psych -
"Guys, in general, aren't as good at nonverbal communication [as women are]. What evidence do we have of this?" Dr. Marrero asks. (Crickets chirp.) "...Divorce rates?" a middle-aged man named Lewis asks hesitantly.
2-1-17, RSU Theater -
During the second night of auditions for Tom Sawyer, a Comm major I don't know very well named Brittany arrives late, slips into a chair. As soon as she sits down, Eric finishes his monologue onstage and David scans the room. "WES! BRITTANY! You two try running Tom and Becky's engagement scene!" It was a funny but awkward first meeting. I get cast as Tom's insufferable little brother Sid, and Brittany is hired as assistant director.
2-2-17, Capstone -
"Everybody ought to be a mother. It would help with all the selfishness in the world," Hailey muses.
2-15-17, Psych -
"Sometimes you land on Omaha [Beach], sometimes you land on Utah [Beach]." - Dr. Marrero's philosophy on tests.
2-16-17, Capstone -
Saige walks out of Shakespeare just as I'm about to go into Capstone when she spins around suddenly. "Can I take your picture, Wes? You are like, THE image of the Distraught College Student right now."
2-21-17, Pop Market -
While we're debating the limits of historical fiction - "So the American Revolution with elves would count?" Dr. Dial-Driver asks. "Christmas elves?" Debra tries to clarify. "No, Keebler elves," somebody else answers. (We couldn't quite decide on that one, but reached a tentative hypothesis that it must be at least twenty years in the past to count as historical fiction.)
3-2-17, Pop Market -
"They probably have strong hearts - and weak arms," a high school football coach grouches about his new team in a flashfic from Kara.
3-9-17, Pop Market -
"Okay, a tragedy, that's fine, but - Damn! Why'd you have to kill the dog?!" Dr. Dial-Driver asks me after Kara and I read my flashfic play of a couple's elderly dog being euthanized. This was the general reaction afterwards. Kara wrote about a grandmother with dementia, who I played. That was odd. And Vito and Shane wrote about gangsters who were trying to torture the Easter Bunny by tickling him.
3-28-17, Pop Market -
"If you're really drunk when you die, are you still drunk as a zombie?" Debra wonders.
4-11-17, RSU Theater -
During dress rehearsal for Tom Sawyer, David and assistant director Brittany are huddled over a review script, giving notes as necessary. "So, Aunt Polly, here you're praying, remember-" David slaps the book, an inch away from Brittany's nose. The scene comes to a screeching halt as we all stare in horror, making sure she's okay. "There was a bug...." David explains lamely.
4-15-17, RSU Theaterish -
"Sid Sawyer is the Eddie Haskell of American literature." - Derek Steeley says on Facebook. He's right.
4-18-17, Pop Market -
"I've got the attention span of a dying gnat." - Dr. Dial-Driver.
4-19-17, Psych -
We're all sharing how the various departments do their Capstones. After one horror story, Joanna says, "That sounds awful. I bet the whole room wanted to throw up. Like, for her."
4-20-17, Capstone -
"Remember, all of y'all, no matter how badly it [the Capstone presentations] go tomorrow, no small children will die." (Dr. Dial-Driver suddenly remembers that most of us were in Lit Traditions together.) "And no cats will be murdered, either!" (We howled over Poe's "The Black Cat" in that class.)
4-21-17, Capstone -
"So you're saying that [Rebecca's] De Winter solves the problem by loving the narrator," someone on the Committee asks Madison," "and [Jane Eyre's] Rochester solves the problem by attempting to save his first wife from the house fire, but what about [Wuthering Heights's] Heathcliff?" "Heathcliff solves the problem by dying," Madison answers, straight-faced. Argument about Heathcliff occurs here between Committee members. "See, now I was gonna say that murder was the red flag in relationships with all of these guys..." Dr. Ford says in his deadpan way.
I found this one while going through old notebooks to see what I could throw out, from 3-25-13, in Comp II -
Someone mentions Taylor Swift during class. "Who's Taylor Swift?" our graduate-assistant teacher Jason asks in all seriousness.
1-17-17, Creative Writing for the Popular Market -
"Text in class, I'll eat your phone." - Dr. Dial-Driver.
1-21-17, Pop Market -
"Aah!" Dr. Dial-Driver yelps. "I have errant coffee!" Her drink had spilled.
1-25-17, Psychopathology of the Criminal Mind -
Apparently lions and hyenas naturally loathe each other.
1-30-17, Psych -
"Guys, in general, aren't as good at nonverbal communication [as women are]. What evidence do we have of this?" Dr. Marrero asks. (Crickets chirp.) "...Divorce rates?" a middle-aged man named Lewis asks hesitantly.
2-1-17, RSU Theater -
During the second night of auditions for Tom Sawyer, a Comm major I don't know very well named Brittany arrives late, slips into a chair. As soon as she sits down, Eric finishes his monologue onstage and David scans the room. "WES! BRITTANY! You two try running Tom and Becky's engagement scene!" It was a funny but awkward first meeting. I get cast as Tom's insufferable little brother Sid, and Brittany is hired as assistant director.
2-2-17, Capstone -
"Everybody ought to be a mother. It would help with all the selfishness in the world," Hailey muses.
2-15-17, Psych -
"Sometimes you land on Omaha [Beach], sometimes you land on Utah [Beach]." - Dr. Marrero's philosophy on tests.
2-16-17, Capstone -
Saige walks out of Shakespeare just as I'm about to go into Capstone when she spins around suddenly. "Can I take your picture, Wes? You are like, THE image of the Distraught College Student right now."
2-21-17, Pop Market -
While we're debating the limits of historical fiction - "So the American Revolution with elves would count?" Dr. Dial-Driver asks. "Christmas elves?" Debra tries to clarify. "No, Keebler elves," somebody else answers. (We couldn't quite decide on that one, but reached a tentative hypothesis that it must be at least twenty years in the past to count as historical fiction.)
3-2-17, Pop Market -
"They probably have strong hearts - and weak arms," a high school football coach grouches about his new team in a flashfic from Kara.
3-9-17, Pop Market -
"Okay, a tragedy, that's fine, but - Damn! Why'd you have to kill the dog?!" Dr. Dial-Driver asks me after Kara and I read my flashfic play of a couple's elderly dog being euthanized. This was the general reaction afterwards. Kara wrote about a grandmother with dementia, who I played. That was odd. And Vito and Shane wrote about gangsters who were trying to torture the Easter Bunny by tickling him.
3-28-17, Pop Market -
"If you're really drunk when you die, are you still drunk as a zombie?" Debra wonders.
4-11-17, RSU Theater -
During dress rehearsal for Tom Sawyer, David and assistant director Brittany are huddled over a review script, giving notes as necessary. "So, Aunt Polly, here you're praying, remember-" David slaps the book, an inch away from Brittany's nose. The scene comes to a screeching halt as we all stare in horror, making sure she's okay. "There was a bug...." David explains lamely.
4-15-17, RSU Theaterish -
"Sid Sawyer is the Eddie Haskell of American literature." - Derek Steeley says on Facebook. He's right.
4-18-17, Pop Market -
"I've got the attention span of a dying gnat." - Dr. Dial-Driver.
4-19-17, Psych -
We're all sharing how the various departments do their Capstones. After one horror story, Joanna says, "That sounds awful. I bet the whole room wanted to throw up. Like, for her."
4-20-17, Capstone -
"Remember, all of y'all, no matter how badly it [the Capstone presentations] go tomorrow, no small children will die." (Dr. Dial-Driver suddenly remembers that most of us were in Lit Traditions together.) "And no cats will be murdered, either!" (We howled over Poe's "The Black Cat" in that class.)
4-21-17, Capstone -
"So you're saying that [Rebecca's] De Winter solves the problem by loving the narrator," someone on the Committee asks Madison," "and [Jane Eyre's] Rochester solves the problem by attempting to save his first wife from the house fire, but what about [Wuthering Heights's] Heathcliff?" "Heathcliff solves the problem by dying," Madison answers, straight-faced. Argument about Heathcliff occurs here between Committee members. "See, now I was gonna say that murder was the red flag in relationships with all of these guys..." Dr. Ford says in his deadpan way.
Sunday, May 7, 2017
May Sunday
It was a hot early-summer Sunday. Or maybe that's late-spring Sunday? It's Oklahoma, hard to know the seasons sometimes. Anyway, woke up about 8 a.m. and walked down to the Claremore Assembly of God. Sat in with the Discover the Word-ish old people again, the three women and two men, they were all glad to see me come back, which was nice. "Can we adopt him?" someone asked, meaning me. "That's a good idea," "Let's!" other folks agreed. Snippet of conversation, which is why I love hanging around older folks: "Hey, Stranger," one of the ladies greets another. "'Stranger'?! Who you callin' a stranger?" "Well, I ain't seen you in a week, so...."
The sermon was from the youth pastor, since they were recognizing the high school and college graduates today. It was fine, in a bland prepackaged way, full of the usual things that are said to Christian soon-to-be-college-students. Got me to thinking about the paths my generation of the GBC youth group and SGYC campers have gone down over the years.
Lot of Songs of the Day chasing themselves around today - woke up with the Booth Brothers' "He Saw It All" playing, quickly followed by the Cluster Pluckers' "Weapon of Prayer." Those are gospel, which makes sense, at least - it's Sunday, so I tuned the radio into Big Country's gospel show while getting ready. They weren't playing today, but they often do. Grandpa liked listening to the gospel show, and he and Robbie always watched Gaither specials anytime they were on. Others were Rhett Akins' "Katy Brought My Guitar Back Today," Taylor Swift's "Forever and Always," "Words By Heart" from Billy Ray Cyrus, both versions of Swift's "Enchanted" and Nichole Nordeman's "Legacy."
After church let out I was ambushed by a middle-aged couple named Jim and Jodie who invited me to have lunch with them. I'm fairly certain they were trying to decide whether to set me up with their daughter the Southwest Baptist nursing major, but it wasn't terribly awkward. They're missionaries in eastern Asia on furlough, and we talked for a while about books, particularly speculating on which modern-day theologians could write passable mystery fiction, in the vein of G.K. Chesterton and Dorothy Sayers. We nominated Phillip Yancey and John Piper as candidates who ought to try it, and maybe R.C. Sproul and Ravi Zacharias.
I accidentally locked myself out of my apartment earlier tonight, which is extremely embarrassing.
The sermon was from the youth pastor, since they were recognizing the high school and college graduates today. It was fine, in a bland prepackaged way, full of the usual things that are said to Christian soon-to-be-college-students. Got me to thinking about the paths my generation of the GBC youth group and SGYC campers have gone down over the years.
Lot of Songs of the Day chasing themselves around today - woke up with the Booth Brothers' "He Saw It All" playing, quickly followed by the Cluster Pluckers' "Weapon of Prayer." Those are gospel, which makes sense, at least - it's Sunday, so I tuned the radio into Big Country's gospel show while getting ready. They weren't playing today, but they often do. Grandpa liked listening to the gospel show, and he and Robbie always watched Gaither specials anytime they were on. Others were Rhett Akins' "Katy Brought My Guitar Back Today," Taylor Swift's "Forever and Always," "Words By Heart" from Billy Ray Cyrus, both versions of Swift's "Enchanted" and Nichole Nordeman's "Legacy."
After church let out I was ambushed by a middle-aged couple named Jim and Jodie who invited me to have lunch with them. I'm fairly certain they were trying to decide whether to set me up with their daughter the Southwest Baptist nursing major, but it wasn't terribly awkward. They're missionaries in eastern Asia on furlough, and we talked for a while about books, particularly speculating on which modern-day theologians could write passable mystery fiction, in the vein of G.K. Chesterton and Dorothy Sayers. We nominated Phillip Yancey and John Piper as candidates who ought to try it, and maybe R.C. Sproul and Ravi Zacharias.
I accidentally locked myself out of my apartment earlier tonight, which is extremely embarrassing.
Friday, May 5, 2017
Events of Today
Woke up this morning at 4 a.m. after falling asleep about 1 a.m. Watched Netflix for a bit, then decided to take a pre-dawn walk around campus, shoot some pictures while things are still quiet. (Thirteen Reasons Why is terrible, by the way, which is about the way it goes with Netflix original series.) The pictures weren't the greatest nature photography ever taken, but it was enjoyable, and it brightened people's Facebook feeds. Hung out with Brittany for about an hour just before lunchtime, that was cool. Conversation topics included people misspelling our names and trading stories about church camp and stupid ways to injure oneself.
Then I went for a walk through the nature reserve, since it was a beautiful day.
Cody and I went to see Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 this afternoon, which was just as irreverent and hilarious as I expected, with as much emotion as a Captain America movie. (That part surprised me, but in a good way.) It was very good, in other words. "Lol, that's awesome!" was Ashland's response to my immediate-reaction report.
I might have gotten a paid internship with the Creek Nation for the summer, so that would be something known, at least, about what the future holds.
Playoff hockey on TV tonight, St. Louis topped Nashville 2-1 in a nasty hardfought game five, and Edmonton-Anaheim on right now. There's a horse called Patch running in the Kentucky Derby tomorrow, who I might root for because he only has one eye. NASCAR is at Talladega this weekend, so that should be a good one.
Ashleigh, Drew, Ja Li Si, Stephen, Susan and TJ (I'm not sure who all else) graduated from NSU tonight, and Maddie graduated from TCC. Also, Matt Freeland and his wife just graduated. Courtney had an interview with College of the Ozarks that went really well, so that's exciting, too.
Then I went for a walk through the nature reserve, since it was a beautiful day.
Cody and I went to see Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 this afternoon, which was just as irreverent and hilarious as I expected, with as much emotion as a Captain America movie. (That part surprised me, but in a good way.) It was very good, in other words. "Lol, that's awesome!" was Ashland's response to my immediate-reaction report.
I might have gotten a paid internship with the Creek Nation for the summer, so that would be something known, at least, about what the future holds.
Playoff hockey on TV tonight, St. Louis topped Nashville 2-1 in a nasty hardfought game five, and Edmonton-Anaheim on right now. There's a horse called Patch running in the Kentucky Derby tomorrow, who I might root for because he only has one eye. NASCAR is at Talladega this weekend, so that should be a good one.
Ashleigh, Drew, Ja Li Si, Stephen, Susan and TJ (I'm not sure who all else) graduated from NSU tonight, and Maddie graduated from TCC. Also, Matt Freeland and his wife just graduated. Courtney had an interview with College of the Ozarks that went really well, so that's exciting, too.
Thursday, May 4, 2017
3....2...1...
Somebody said that it couldn’t be done But he with a chuckle replied
That “maybe it couldn’t,” but he would be one
Who wouldn’t say so till he’d tried.
So he buckled right in with the trace of a grin
On his face. If he worried he hid it.
He started to sing as he tackled the thing
That couldn’t be done, and he did it!
Somebody scoffed: “Oh, you’ll never do that;
At least no one ever has done it;”
But he took off his coat and he took off his hat
And the first thing we knew he’d begun it.
With a lift of his chin and a bit of a grin,
Without any doubting or quiddit,
He started to sing as he tackled the thing
That couldn’t be done, and he did it.
There are thousands to tell you it cannot be done,
There are thousands to prophesy failure,
There are thousands to point out to you one by one,
The dangers that wait to assail you.
But just buckle in with a bit of a grin,
Just take off your coat and go to it;
Just start in to sing as you tackle the thing
That “cannot be done,” and you’ll do it.
My notes for today's Pop Market:
Captain America: The First Avenger and Guardians of the Galaxy were on TV last night, so it was good to rewatch them. Iron Man 3 is on right now, which adds a nice near-symmetry to the college experience. It was a fantastic way to end my freshman year. The First Avenger came out in 2011, just before we discovered the MCU, and Guardians was an interesting way to start my junior year - which was, uh, eventful. It's maybe my favorite MCU movie, partially because it's so irreverent; makes a good change of pace from everything else. (Cap and GotG reviews on the writing blog.)
Also did some work on the book review blog this afternoon, cleaning up unnecessary labels and tags.
Wednesday, May 3, 2017
ADORABLE COATIMUNDI
What exactly is a coatimundi? Kind of a South American raccoon, according to Wikipedia. And I'm pretty sure that they were on Kratt's Kreatures or Zaboomafoo at one point.
A girl named Cheyenne asked Dr. Marrero if she could bring her critter to Psych on Wednesday, since it was the last day of class. "Sure, I think that'd be fine," he shrugs. That critter turns out to be a coatimundi named Toby, who brings all traffic in the hallway to a standstill. So there's about twenty students and three professors all freaking out about how weird/adorable the critter is, and petting him. He acts a lot like a cat, so he would pounce from shoulder to shoulder, then move on to the next more-interesting person. Just about the size of Trevor's cat Timmy, his fur felt like that, too - kind of greasy but soft and very thick. Toby managed to sneak into the Writing Center, scaring Kenzie half to death. And Dr. Marrero was ten minutes late to class because of conducting a job interview for somebody (he's the head of the Psych Department, like Dr. Mackie is the head of the English Department). So we had more time to play with Toby before class, where he then ran loose, drank someone's Pepsi and surprise-pounced inside the hoods of everyone's jackets.
 |
| "What the heck are you?" Dr. Marrero asks Toby. |
 |
| "I'm just gonna hide in the corner underneath the sign-in sheet." |
 |
| "Never mind. I'll explore instead." |
 |
| Toby tried to eat Brittany's ponytail at one point. The girl in the background is his owner. |
Because of course we were all snapping pictures, it was hard to pay attention. The Kratt brothers and Steve Irwin have been frequent discussion topics inside Baird Hall.
Yesterday morning I was supposed to meet a girl for a date, so I get to the coffee shop about fifteen minutes early and wait awkwardly for 45 minutes. Then I figure that traffic was busy (TRAINS), or finals studying slipped it from her memory. About 7 p.m. I get a text: "Omg. Sorry, I totally forgot." It happens sometimes.
As I'm leaving the Centennial Center I spot Debra struggling to finish her fiction portfolio, so I say hi and we chat about work for a bit. Then in the afternoon Kenzie and I suggest edits for the next time Dr. Mackie teaches Gothic Film and Lit, what we thought worked, what didn't, etc.
Not quite as unusual as Toby, but my former roommate Dalton brought his Lab/Pyrenees puppy Grace to the Chi Alpha meeting last night, which instantly made him the most popular person in the room. She plays soccer with ping pong balls, swiping them Pyr-style, but with silky Lab ears. Fluffy Pyr coat, but light brown fur.
Not quite as unusual as Toby, but my former roommate Dalton brought his Lab/Pyrenees puppy Grace to the Chi Alpha meeting last night, which instantly made him the most popular person in the room. She plays soccer with ping pong balls, swiping them Pyr-style, but with silky Lab ears. Fluffy Pyr coat, but light brown fur.
Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. was another fantastic Framework episode last night. Talked about it with Trevor for a little while afterwards.
The Kentucky Derby is Saturday afternoon. Going by the horses' names, I like Fast and Accurate, Always Dreaming, Untrapped, State of Honor, Hence, Sonneteer and Irish War Cry.
The Kentucky Derby is Saturday afternoon. Going by the horses' names, I like Fast and Accurate, Always Dreaming, Untrapped, State of Honor, Hence, Sonneteer and Irish War Cry.
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