Remembering the Challenger Explosion

     Thursday marked the thirtieth anniversary of the Challenger explosion. I was really surprised(and disappointed) that I couldn't find any TV specials about it. (Scowling particuarly hard in the direction of the History Channel.) This YouTube video archived the live news feed of the explosion. That night, President Ronald Reagan gave the following speech, written by Peggy Noonan. (Emphasis mine.)

     "...Today is a day for mourning and remembering. Nancy and I are pained to the core by the tragedy of the shuttle Challenger. We know we share this pain with all the people of our country. This is, truly, a national loss. Nineteen years ago, almost to the day, we lost three astronauts in a terrible accident on the ground. But we've never lost an astronaut in flight - we've never had a tragedy like this. And perhaps we've forgotten the courage it took for the crew of the shuttle. But they, the Challenger Seven, were aware of the dangers, and overcame them and did their jobs brilliantly. We mourn seven heroes: Michael Smith, Dick Scobee, Judith Resnik, Ronald McNair, Ellison Onizuka, Gergory Jarvis and Christa McAuliffe. We mourn their loss as a nation together. The families of the seven, we cannot bear, as you do, the full impact of this tragedy. But we feel the loss, and we are thinking of you so very much. Your loved ones were daring and brave, and they had that special grace, that special spirit that says, 'Give me a challenge, and I will meet it with joy.' 
     "They had a hunger to explore the universe and to discover its truths. They wished to serve, and they did. They served all of us. We've grown used to wonders in this century: it's hard to dazzle us. But for 25 years the United States Space Program has been doing just that. We've grown used to the idea of space, and perhaps we've forgotten that we've only just begun. We're still pioneers. They, the members of the Challenger crew, were pioneers.
     "And I want to say something to the schoolchildren of America who were watching the live coverage of the shuttle's takeoff: I know it's hard to understand, but sometimes painful things like this happen. It's all part of the process of exploration and discovery. It's all part of taking a chance and expanding man's horizons. The future doesn't belong to the fainthearted; it belongs to the brave. The Challenger crew were pulling us into the future, and we will continue to follow. 
     "I've always had great faith in, and respect for, our space program. And what happened today does nothing to diminish it. We don't hide our space program, we don't keep secrets and cover things up, we do it all up front and in public. That's the way freedom is, and we wouldn't change any of it in a minute. We will continue our quest in space; there will be more shuttle flights, and more shuttle crews, and yes, more volunteers, more civilians, more teachers in space. Nothing ends here. Our hopes and our journeys continue. 
     "I want to add that I wish I could talk to every man and every woman who works for NASA, or who worked on this mission, and tell them: 'Your dedication and professionalism had moved and impressed us for decades. And we know of your anguish. We share it.' 
     "There's a coincidence today, on this day 390 years ago the great explorer Sir Francis Drake died aboard ship off the coast of Canada. In his lifetime, the great frontiers were the oceans, and a historian later said, 'He was raised by the sea, lived on the sea, and he was buried by it.' Well, today, we can say of the Challenger crew, their dedication was, like Drake's, complete. The crew of the space shuttle Challenger honored us by the manner in which they lived their lives. We will never forget them, nor the last time we saw them this morning, as they prepared for their journey and waved goodbye, and slipped the surly bonds of earth to touch the face of God."

     This is an amazing speech. The world has gotten so cynical, I'm ashamed to say that I wonder exactly how much of this was heartfelt and how much was acting. But that doesn't matter, because it works either way. It had been a long time since the country had had a disaster of this scale(JFK's death, probably?); and we were hurting. We needed to hear this message, to calm our nerves and assure us the world would keep spinning. The language he used is extremely plain and everyday; even the multisyllable words are common and simple, like "coincidence" and "Challenger". It's easy to understand. And it's comforting. Inspiring, even. (The cynical part of me wonders what are we inspired about, like it does during the Olympics.)
     But that paragraph speaking straight to the kids - that's one of the greatest parts of this speech. Mom was one of those kids watching; I was watching fifteen years later when 9/11 happened. Resgan just explained what happened, like Mr. Rogers advised, and he didn't hide that he didn't understand it all yet, either.
     But as a nation, we mourned. Together. This happened in the aftermath of 9/11, but grief brings people together far closer than anything else does. It's comforting, somehow, particularly in these times we live in now, to realize that it's possible for an entire country to be weeping in response to an event. Maybe that's just because we're constantly at each other's throats about race violence or gay rights or abortion or any of the other things ripping the nation apart right now.
     "They had that special grace, that special spirit that says, 'Give me a challenge, and I will meet it with joy.'" (Looking at you, Leslie Knope.) That might be one of the most perfect and inspirational epitaphs you could ask for.
     Think about it.
     Don't you want to have someone say that about you when you're gone?
     I just shook my head at the part where he said "we don't keep secrets and cover things up, we do it all up front and in public. That's the way freedom is, and we wouldn't change any of it in a minute." We don't do that any longer. Maybe we never did. But a lot of things change in thirty years, and a lot of that freedom, that feeling of invincibility, has gotten lost somewhere along the way. And it's really sad.
     That final phrase is amazing. "...and they slipped the surly bonds of earth to touch the face of God." "Surly" means "ill-humored or ill-tempered" according to my copy of the Webster New American Handy College Dictionary, which is a great way of looking at this life, because it's just so true. And while Dale Hinshaw from Philip Gulley's Harmony novels might be a weirdo who could've come straight from Pawnee, he has good intentions, most of the time. But anyway, he said once that being faced with sickness was bound to turn our thoughts to the eternal. This is especially true in times of massive tragedy like this.
 
     I don't know, I've always said pop-culturally I belonged to the 80's. So that might have played a part in the solemnity that was the anniversary, why I couldn't concentrate on school. Or maybe it's just my love of history. One of the most amazing sights at the Newseum while on Youth Tour was the local paper right after the disaster from Christa McAuliffe's hometown. The scale of the event had something to do with it; cell phones and the internet didn't exist yet. But I read somewhere that 85 percent of the country knew what happened within one hour.

The front page of the Concord (N.H.) Monitor from Tuesday, January 28, 1986. Concord was the hometown of civilian astronaut Christa McAuliffe, a teacher at the high school.

     It just needed to be talked about.

AI 15.8 - Hollywood: Group Round

     This is where things get hectic. Ladies and gentlemen: the infamous Group Night!
     Some people made it through more than others. (The judges, particularly Harry, had a rough day.)
     "They gotta figure out which song they're gonna sing, they got to figure out the choreography they're gonna use, and they gotta figure out how to not kill each other tonight," Keith observed.

This is just a stock-type picture I took of my guitar a long time ago. I got tired of using the same AI logo all the time with these posts.

     We started the day with 108 contestants. The casualties began even before the performances; as Po Scott dropped out of the competition completely; leaving Dalton Rappatoni and Kassy Levels scrambling to find a third member for their group(Chicken Noodle Soup) to be legal. (They had to be either three or four members.)
     Malie "Miss Alaska DJ" Delgado, Manny Torres and Christian Eason were left as a threesome after La'Porscha dropped out; they had to pull together a new song and everything, so they changed their group's name to Rebirth while they were at it.
     Team Blue Eyes was made up of Jordan Sasser, Kory Wheeler, Jenna Renae and some girl named Kelsie Watts, who had Allison Iraheta-red-dyed hair. They sang a Bruno Mars song called "Treasure", and they were all safe.
     Milk and Cookies, composed of Jenn Blosil and Sara Sturm, together with a black girl named Bri Ray and a tall blonde named Lynzee Fraye, rehearsed in the bathroom for lack of anywhere else with enough space to practice. Besides Sara, I hated everyone, but they were all through...
     There was an entertaining montage about what a chocoholic JayLo apparently is, after she tries to steal some of Keith's food like Nicki used to. "Ya know, she looks thin, but she eats about six and a half pounds of chocolate a day," Harry quips. "No, it's more like eight pounds," Keith answers, grinning. She protests. "Would you like some sushi instead? I'm having some delivered..." (Smart guy, eating snacks like sushi and trail mix to keep Jennifer and Nicki from eating all his food.)
     The next group was Ooh X2, made up of Tristan McIntosh, Amelia "Mystery Samurai Fiddler" Eisenhauer, Lee Jean and some blonde girl whose name started with H. "That sounded like you all were an actual vocal group!" Keith praised them. They were all through, which was awesome. Jeneve Rose Mitchell was also safe, from a different group.
     Next up was Just Trent, the Group Round's first-ever group of one. (Mono is apparently contagious, and the producers wanted to keep the other contestants as healthy as possible.) He got through.
     The next group was called Singing Out Loud, made up of Michelle Marie, Lindsey Carrier, Ashley Lusk and Shelbie Z. Their song was Carrie's "Undo It", and it was awful. I would have been just fine with everyone in this group packing their bags, but only Lindsey was booted out, which was even worse because she was the team's leader.
     Elvie Shane, John Wayne Schulz and Jessica Cabral were a group, and they were visibly exhausted. "You're genuinely exhausted by this point, but you still gotta perform. Welcome to your career! It's gonna be like this all the time. The only thing is, you gotta hide that tiredness from me." Keith critiques helpfully. Elvie was cut.
     Also cut was Ashley Adams-Soderbergh the weird Hawaiian misfit, and Cameron Richard. Mackenzie Bourg was safe.
     It wouldn't be Group Night without some Drama, right? That came in the form of the rivalry which quickly developed between Envy(Sonika Vaid, Stephany Negrete and Andrew Nazaberkian the Tall Russian) and Chicken Noodle Soup(Dalton, Kassy and a girl named Anatalia Villaranda). Anatalia was an alto stuck with the three sopranos of Envy, and they literally abandoned her in the hallway. Since Chicken Noodle Soup needed a third member, she was drafted, and there was plenty of fireworks the next day between the two groups. All members of both groups advanced, and Sonika crossed the line into "I can't vote for her" territory. Dalton still gets cool points.
     His former rival Jackie Butler(with the green hair) and obese Brian Dale Brown were both cut, as was Josiah Siska(rats!).
     Trick or Treat Try was another one of those groups who practiced in the bathroom; their roster was Kayce Haynes and three guys we'd never heard of named Marcio Donaldson, Jon Klaasen and Kylle Thompson. Their song was "Uptown Funk" and they were all safe. (I would've booted them all out...bow ties are stupid.)
     "If you could have any talent in the world other than singing, what would it be?" Harry asked Jennifer. She thinks a minute. "Painting." "Really? Have you tried it?" "Yup. I'm awful at it." "Well, what'd you try? Oils? Watercolors?" "Crayons, everything!"
     The roster of LOUD Joy Dove, Daniel Farmer and Lindita the Personal Trainer made up the group known as Smooth Soul, doing Katy Perry's "Teenage Dream," of all things...Daniel was cut.
     Las Orinquas was Gianna Isabella, some girl named Dana Ordway and a bossy girl named Eliz Camacho. Eliz was eliminated after Harry said "There were two 24-year-olds in this group. And you were outsang by the 15-year-old." (Gianna does a happy dance here.)
     The Good Vibes were four "Who?" contestants; a redheaded guy named Joe Kahlman, another dude named Anesai Talai, a girl named Olivia Thai and a nerdy girl named Jessica Paige, who was the only one to advance. "Guys, you look like your dog just died," Harry was really at his wit's end by this point.
    CJ Johnson the Memphis musician, another guy named Zach Joseph, a blonde ponytailed girl named Jess Kellner and another blonde girl with a headband named Jessica Baker were another group, and Zach was the odd one out here.
     Thomas Stringfellow was part of a group with Bryson Dunn, Thomas Hendricks and some guy with the last name Muglia; the Thomases were the lucky ones. "You guys are all absolutely great solo artists....but that was really average." Harry complains.
     Then it was Rebirth's(Malie, Manny and Christian) turn....they did "Stayin' Alive," and it was pretty good. "Best group of the day, don't ya think?" JayLo asks the guys.
     The Three Sistas were La'Porscha and two girls named Marlena Johnson and Tonie Starr, Shelbie Z was originally part of this group before defecting to Singing Out Loud. So she was replaced by La'Porscha, who came in from Rebirth, and they also did "Stayin' Alive" as one of the last acts of the day. Everyone forgot the lyrics. Aggravatingly, they were all safe. "That's how you forget the words!" Harry laughed, applauding. "That was like watching Dreamgirls or somethin'," Jennifer said.
    The Soulcats were the last group of the day, composed of Jonathan Arthur Greene and three people we'd never seen before: Lauren Wright(not the friend of the Hankinses who went to church camp), Marshall Cunningham and some guy named Dylan. Lauren and Marshall were safe, the other two weren't.

AI 15.7 - Hollywood: Lines of Ten

     Dim the lights, please....

     We're in Hollywood now. This is where the pressure ramps up exponentially, drama is captured onscreen, and the field is winnowed down to a manageable number. 190 people were given Golden Tickets, but many of them would see their dreams shatter in the opening of "Hell Week," as it's been called frequently in the past. First up, the Lines of Ten(which is exactly what it sounds like). Everyone sings, then the field is weeded. Those who survive advance to the Group Round.

     The first thing we learned was that Dalton Rappatoni and Jackie Butler were rivals on the Dallas alt-rock scene; they both survived into the Group Round, as did Jordan Sasser.
     The next row included Jenn Blosil(ew), Thomas Stringfellow and Olivia Rox, all of who escaped unscathed. (Go Thomas and Olivia!)
     Jessica Cabral(who I don't really remember much), Melanie "Model Eyes" Tierce and Sonika Vaid were all in the next line, and sadly, Melanie was cut.
     In the fourth line we saw, La'Porscha "HORRIBLE PERM" Renae got through(BOO....), while Harrison Cohen was dropped. His answer to the interview question, "What're you gonna do now?" was "Well, I guess fill out some college applications..."
     Manny "Crush on Jennifer" Torres, Daniel "Crush on Jennifer" Farmer and Sara Sturm all made it through in one piece.
     Lee Jean got through, which was cool. Shelbie Z the Hairdresser advancing was not. With that, the first day of Hollywood Week ended, and people got an anxious night's sleep.
     When Day 2 opened, Jeneve Rose Mitchell(Off-the-Grid Cello Cowgirl) played a funky version of Little Big Town's "Boondocks" well enough to get through, and then there was a funny montage of the parents watching; Jimmy Kimmel running into Ryan, and contestants freaking out about One Direction doing a soundcheck across the street.
     Gianna Isabella and Tristan McIntosh(with the army mom) were both safe; Tristan sang Carrie's "Something in the Water."
     Kyrsti Jewel "Superfan" Chavez wasn't able to keep going, but Cameron Richard was, and frustratingly, Michelle Marie was allowed to keep going.
     Creepy Kerry Courtney, Sand Springs plumber Jake Dillon, Melany Huber the girl with cancer and Ethan Kuntz all were sent packing.
     Trent Harmon the R&B Farmer got mono, but somehow powered through to last another day. Po Scott had a Princess Leia hairdo going on, which maybe intimidated the judges into sending her through, and Emily Brooke also advanced.

     108 contestants remain....

Modeling Christlikeness in a Sitcom-like Stage Family

     The first assignment for Topics of Advanced Composition was for a personal essay. I was missing everyone from the BCM. So this was good(though tough to reexperience everything from this time) to write, and extremely easy to research. It scored a 93, and when I turned in a revised draft, Dr. Dial-Driver gave me a look like, "Really?" That version got a 100 points.

            Talking about the citizens of Pawnee, Indiana, Parks and Recreation’s Ben Wyatt says at one point, “You know, it’s weird. I’ve been to a lot of towns…usually people don’t care about anything. I mean, don’t get me wrong, they’re weirdos, but….they’re weirdos that care” (“Time Capsule”). For a while around the Northeastern State University campus, and to a lesser extent the city of Tahlequah or Cherokee County generally, if “the SWAT team” were mentioned, the speaker likely didn’t mean a squad of heavily-armed law enforcement officers. Instead they were talking about the drama ministry of the Baptist Collegiate Ministries, which was considered as somewhat of a loose cannon amongst the tight-knit community of BCM outreaches. But we cared about each other. And that was important.

            I was a loner growing up, for the most part. Not that I didn’t like people – it’s more just that I like a small group of specific people, and if someone is able to gain my trust in order to be called a friend, then that trust is nearly indestructible. I had acted in middle school musicals with our homeschool co-op and really enjoyed that, but in general, Oklahoma is rather lacking in acting opportunities. So there was just the occasional murder-mystery, and quoting good TV lines with my siblings. But in general, nothing, which didn’t do much to take my mind off a disastrous freshman year of college or the violent implosion of the sarcastic, witty and creative support group that served as our personal Buffy-type “Scooby Gang” for me and my friends in surviving high school.

            The project known as “Students with a Testimony” began when Samantha Hill transferred to NSU around the spring of 2012 from Carl Albert; their branch of the BCM had a drama ministry primarily used as a tool for evangelization, and Sam wanted to continue that work in and around Tahlequah. She obtained the blessing of NSU BCM directors Bob and Debbie Lipscomb, and then the project was off and running. So she set out to round up some team members through word-of-mouth.

     “I pretty much just had to go out on a limb, finding strangers who wanted to be a part of the BCM and say, ‘Hey, are you a Christian? Would you like to share your testimony?’” she said during an interview for an unpublished newspaper article in September 2013. “I was the crazy girl that everyone saw coming and, believe me, they’d run the other way, because they knew exactly what I was wanting to recruit them for.”

Sam tried to recruit me to immediately join the team when I came to Tahlequah in fall 2012, but I declined, since I thought I had better focus solely on schoolwork until I was more adapted to campus culture. Besides, I was more involved at the time with Campus Christian Fellowship, another ministry which has (though no one on either side wants to actually admit it) a fierce rivalry with the BCM. She got about a dozen people to sign up, though; and they performed a handful of shows in churches of various sizes, interspersing testimonies and Scripture with music and comedy sketches.

     Through a mix of gentle pestering by Sam throughout the year and knowing several other people who attended the BCM regularly, together with realizing that CCF wasn’t at all a place where I could grow spiritually, I started going to the Monday-night worship service, and gradually discovered that this was a good organization to be a part of. When fall 2013 started up and the SWAT sign-ups were passed around, I figured that I ought to dive deeper into helping out. It had been forever since I’d acted in anything, and besides, it was a ministry opportunity. The team was made up of mostly new faces this time around, with Haley Ritter co-leading the group with Sam for a semester.

     “I actually heard about SWAT when I first met Sam and Haley, they were telling me about it, and it seemed like a really, really cool way to do ministry,” said Elizabeth Hodge in an interview from September 2013. “I’ve been involved in theater most of my life, but never have done any kind of ministry like this before. It’s a really cool way to spread the Gospel, because you don’t have to go five thousand miles away and spend five thousand dollars.”

     Once we’d gotten the sketches memorized, life quickly turned into something of a sitcom: Friends was blended into Full House and the sketch comedy group Studio C, and then that combination was added to the YouTube series Messy Mondays, as I put it in a blog post simply titled “SWAT.” But we really did become like family. Sam was the mom of the group, Haley the drill-sergeant aunt. And together, they kept things running with a mix of strictness and sweetness. Jacob was the cool older cousin, while Elizabeth, Susan and I were like siblings. Neighbors included the spacey janitor James, four-wheeling Becca, obnoxious Scott (everyone hated him), couple Skylar and Ja Li Si (we gave them a hard time, of course), while Caleb and Holly were always sort of hanging out in the corner. New additions to the cast several weeks in were TJ, serving as the fiery deadpan snarker in addition to doing voiceovers, while Justin turned out to be a jack-of-all-trades, doing everything from locating churches to running sound equipment and acting.

     There were a lot of coffee runs to McDonald’s when someone had a lot on their mind –

“Random coffee runs late at night make for a gem of a night,” Elizabeth tweeted once – and there was entertaining improvisation out of necessity, and malapropisms galore (well-chronicled in my video “SWAT Blooper Reel”). Road trips to and from shows were also very…interesting, to say the least. As Elizabeth said, “The basic theme of all our road trips is, like once we get there, you ask: ‘…But did we die?’ And that sums up everything perfectly.” For example, there was that night we went looking for the invisible church in Sallisaw.

     Having put together a silent project to go with the Lifehouse song “Everything” for a charity fundraiser/talent show, we were invited to perform it at a revival at Deliverance Baptist the next week. We didn’t usually do shows on Wednesday nights unless it was a special occasion, and this definitely counted. Thing was, though, we’d lost several key props between performances, since it was supposed to be a one-time thing. And several people were late, adding to the tension. So we nervously played ping pong to pass the time, then split up, one group racing to Wal-Mart for glass-bottled root beer, the other group flying to Dollar Tree for play-food money. We got to Sallisaw with a half hour to spare, more than enough time to find the church…..except that none of us can find it on our phones’ maps. We did find three other churches, which all turned out to be the wrong ones. So we finally talk Jacob into calling the pastor, where he’s given directions which sound straightforward enough: “At Wal-Mart, turn right onto Maple and then drive a ways, and then another right.” Maple is located, but it leads to a really sketchy-looking neighborhood….and none of us (ten people in three vehicles) had ever been to this city before, so we were completely lost. And by now it was pouring down rain. Susan and I ask for directions from some terrified construction workers at the Assembly of God, which turns out to be another dead end. (Also, we realized once we got back in the car that she was already in costume as Death.) We get a lead on another place it might be, which takes us several miles out of town and past three burned-out buildings which were at one point churches. The search has now taken an hour and fifteen minutes, all five occupants of our car vote for giving up and finding dinner. We relay this information back to the other two cars, and then eat and drive back home to Tahlequah, crying in frustration yet knowing the situation was hilarious. . This experience was recapped in far more detail in my blog post “Getting Lost.”

     Weather slowed the beginning of our spring semester’s schedule, but the execution of the performances was greatly improved, due in part to the addition of Drew and Ashleigh as tech crew and about a quarter of the cast dropping out. We banded together often to cover roles whenever necessary, and strengthened connections with the other BCM ministries, as the more musical of us joined the worship band. Organization-wide lunch hangouts were a staple of Friday afternoons, and watch parties during Thunder games caused much screaming and strangling of pillows. The overall atmosphere was much like working in Pawnee’s Parks Department, and when you enjoy your coworkers, coming in every day is awesome. Most of us spent nearly every nonclass moment in either the BCM’s basement, living room or office. Special SWAT events included Christmas caroling at a senior citizens’ center - three days before Thanksgiving - a birthday party picnic, and a game night featuring intense rounds of Catchphrase and Apples to Apples. An elderly pastor in Muskogee even gave a handful of us marriage advice after the show one night. (”If you live long enough to say ‘Yes, dear,’ you’ll live to learn everything else.”) Pretty good advice.

     After Sam and her husband moved once she graduated, the way everyone planned the leadership transition to take place was for Susan to take over the reins the next year, with me taking the second-in-command role which Haley had filled. But there were a lot of family problems at home, which meant that I had to leave for a semester in order to help out. Susan’s theater duties kept her too stressed to run SWAT properly, so it was absorbed into the worship band, where it limped along for the rest of the year before apparently being shut down sometime in spring 2015. And by then transfers happened – Skylar and I came to RSU, Elizabeth went to NSUBA, Caleb to Southwest Baptist, etc. And life happened, too – Justin and Ashleigh fell in love almost immediately, and their wedding will be held in a couple months. Jacob is engaged now, and Haley got married. Ja Li Si became Miss Cherokee last year, and began dating Sam’s brother. Graduations will begin proceeding in a couple months.

     We weren’t that successful at evangelizing, but we did do well at encouraging those who needed it – whether that was audience members, relatives, friends or castmates – through the spiritual valleys, discouragements, breakups, general insecurity and school panic of this life. We were a team, which doesn’t come up very often. You don’t really get that Parks and Rec vibe in real life very often. And when you do….that ought to be treasured. “A team isn’t a bunch of kids out to win; a team is something you belong to. Something you feel. Something you have to earn,” Gordon Bombay said in The Mighty Ducks. We earned that, and you don’t let those ties fall slack. So we still keep in touch, and have mini-reunions whenever possible. I may be allergic to college, but SWAT has definitely been one of the highlights.

Works Cited

Coburn, Wesley. “Getting Lost”. Blog post. Another Lover of the Blade. Blogger. 21 November 2013. Web. 17 January 2016.

--------------------. “SWAT”. Blog post. Another Lover of the Blade. Blogger. 9 November 2013. Web. 17 January 2016. 

-------------------. “SWAT Blooper Reel”. Online video clip. YouTube. YouTube. 29 December 2014. Web. 17 January 2015.

Hill, Samantha. Personal interview. 9 September 2013.

Hodge, Elizabeth. Personal interview. 9 September 2013.

------------------ (HodgepodgeEH). “Random coffee outings late at night make for a gem of a night.” 7 March 2014. Tweet.

The Mighty Ducks. 1992. Dir. Stephen Herek. Buena Vista Pictures, 1992. DVD.

“Time Capsule”. Parks and Recreation: Season Three. Writ. Michael Schur. Dir. Michael Schur. NBCUniversal Television Distribution. 2011. DVD.

Book Sales Brighten School

     Last weekend there was a gigantic sale at a used-book warehouse in Tulsa. So Friday was a hunting trip with Mom and Courtney - and it was a pretty good one. A rough count: Four hundred books total, including twenty cookbooks, about fifteen relating to words and language, about fifty histories, and maybe sixty religious books. So I raced through seven books since Friday. Two of them were devotionals on finding spiritual aspects in Narnia and Napoleon Dynamite to discuss with youth groups, and another was a fantastic history of how pop culture and the Presidency intersect(particularly since this is an election year...and what little knowledge of candidates I have comes from Saturday Night Live...)
     One of those books was Phil Vischer's memoir Me, Myself and Bob; his account of the rise and fall of Big Idea and VeggieTales. It was hard to read at points, knowing what was coming when the company fell apart, but the "building up" was amazing. He met Mike Nawrocki when they were teammates in a college drama ministry focusing on puppetry! (I just finished writing an essay about SWAT, so this was an even cooler fact to discover.)

     School is going fine so far. Nothing amazing, just more of the same. In addition to all that reading, I was able to get most of the homework I needed to done, so that was a good thing. Scriptwriting is a weird course.
   
     Caleb and Dad watched the conference championship games Sunday, so it'll be the Broncos and the Panthers in Super Bowl 50, I guess. I'm waiting for the Daytona 500. And the Olympics. Now I need to get back to more homework; the Flyers-Capitals hockey game is playing on the TV for background noise.

Final American Idol Auditions. EVER.

     It was a really, really strange experience watching last Thursday's episode of American Idol. Because, sure, we've known all along that this is the final season, but this was another moment of realizing what that really meant. And AI is just...special.

     It opened with a stillshot of a Lewis Carroll quote: "In the end, we regret only the chances we didn't take." (To which I add Wayne Gretzky's saying that "You miss 100% of the shots you don't take." I tried the longshot online auditioning once I realized the cattle-calls were over, but I knew it wasn't going to work out. At the same time....I'd always said that I would try.)

     We started the last journey in San Francisco; Jessica Cabral was from Brazil, she had a nice voice, but I would have said no. The judges loved her.
     Cody Ostrenga was the world champion of horseback shooting, apparently. He also belly danced. His voice sounded like karoke, and it was the awful "Proud Mary", but he enjoyed dancing. "That was the singular weirdest collection of talent I've ever seen." - Harry. "Everything was good - except the singing." - Keith. "My belly dances, I guess....but I'm not a belly dancer." - Jennifer.
     Brian Dale Brown was obese. And he had a girlfriend who was 15 years older than he was. AND he auditioned eleven times. His singing sounded more like anguished groaning. And then he did Scooby-Doo impressions? "I've never been more offended, callin' Danny Elfman a musical genius..." Harry huffed. The judges' critiques were theatrical, but quite thorough.
     Gina Baez brought her Jack Russel terrier Tinkerbell into the audition with her. "Don't ya just love the entertainment business? You can come into a job interview with a dog and wearing a sparkly dress with stars on it," Harry comments to Keith and JayLo. She did the Meghan Trainor song "Lips Are Movin'" and had way too much fun. She had a big voice, but like Keith said, it wasn't "deeply interesting."
     With that, the auditions moved to Philadelphia, where there was an awesome "Eye of the Tiger" montage. Melany Huber sang a boring Bruno mars song, with a resonator guitar. It was dull. But Keith said she had a "good storytelling quality to your voice," and she was through. She also had cancer, which made Rachel Platten's "Fight Song" playing over her celebration just perfect.
      Rachel Karyn had her Grandpa Steve playing the guitar for her, she sounded nice from what little we saw of her.
     Caroline Bryne had her brother playing guitar for her, she also sounded nice.
     Bianca Espinal's dad was her guitar player, and she was all right.
     Justin Sullivan was obsessed with Kelly Clarkson. It was right on the line between hilarious and incredibly creepy. He sang "Stronger," of course, and his vocie was pretty good, but not great enough. He was cool with that decision, too, which was good to see. And he looked a lot like NASCAR racer Kyle Larson.
     Dylan the Helium Dude was bad.
     Chyna Sherrad did an Ariana Grande song called "One Last Time", and proudly announced that she was going to represent her home state of Connecticut. "...How do you represent Connecticut?" Harry wondered. Keith's opinion was that it was "laid back and chill. It was great." The finish was extremely worn off her guitar.
     Switching to Atlanta, the crew threw harry a birthday party, where he received a tiny squirrel-sized monkey that he and his daughter had wanted. Jennifer was terrified by it, which was hilarious.
     Lillian Glanton could be this year's Hollie Cavanagh or Skylar Laine, which would be awesome. She was from Alabama, and she sounded like it. Grew up on a poultry farm(this is good....Carrie also had a ruralish background), she sang an original called "Country Boyfriend", which was great! It totally could be on radio right now. She was friendly, too. Keith was a huge YES, Harry had no idea what he was watching, and finally Jennifer let her through. (I cheered loudly.) Then she asks, "Can I take a selfie with y'all?"
     Kayce Hughes was from Talladega, he was a former druggie alcoholic. His song was something by Needtobreathe, and it was pretty good, though weird. Like if you mixed the voices of David Cook and Kris Allen. Harry thought it was a mix of Jon Bon Jovi and Bono. Anyway, he got through, which was cool.
     Zach Person sang the blues really well. "You're from another time," Jennifer said in her critique.
     Tomboy waitress Avalon Young seemed nice. Her song was stupid,
     I missed several contestants in a row here. Then there was a fire alarm for twenty-five minutes, which I wasn't too happy about.
     Jackie Butler had green hair and was in a punk band that lived at her parents' house. She was just....different. I didn't really care for the performance. But she got through.
     Manny Torres was unimpressive for being the final audition ever. "You're Puerto Rican?! It's a yes already!" Jennifer laughed. He had a big crush on her.
     To someone - "How did I know that was gonna happen?" Keith asks.
     To someone else - "Never play guitar again. In public, or ever." - Harry.

     And then the lights dimmed for the final time, and an era of television history came to a close. It's so sad.

AI 15.5 Auditions - Misc. Highlights

     Last Wednesday's American Idol auditions were...almost boring. It was a bunch of highlights from everywhere, which made it hard to follow. But there were a couple bright spots.

      Miranda Scott, called "Po" because she loved Teletubbies as a kid, was wearing something that looked like painter's overalls, and her sister was on the show the year before. I just wrote down "Meh....", but the judges loved her.
     Clay Aiken to a wailing cross-dresser: "It was pretty damn bad. I ain't got time for this."
     Amelia Eisenhauer was a samurai fiddler, Southern and relaxed with a powerful voice, a storyteller type of thing. "There's this mysterious quality about you that I can't figure out....I guess that's why it's mysterious...." Harry's thoughts wandered off somewhere. "Your voice is really extraordinary," Keith praised. "I am so excited. I am gona get some chocolate cake, and...I am not going to scream right here." I liked her.
     Joy Dove was a LOUD black lady. Very exuberant performance; all Harry could say was "You just sing LOUD..." I hated it, but the judges enjoyed her singing. "You're so happy she's from Louisiana right now," Jennifer pokes Harry.
     Mackenzie Bourg has the same birthday as Harry, and he's also from Louisiana. He did something I'd never seen before: a medley of songs from all four judges. "Stupid Boy/Come By Me/Love Don't Cost a Thing/Making Memories of Us". He had weird glasses and hair, but his voice was all right, and he seemed like a creative dude. "I loved the first and fourth songs, I'd never heard of the others," Keith quipped. "You can't get more biased - Louisiana, he has my birthday, and he sang my song. But I like him!" Harry proclaims.
     Andrew and Adam Bridwell were nerds. Like, the Napoleon Dynamite type. Their performance was weird, and the only thing Keith could think of to say was that it sounded like "a Gregorian acid trip." (That's one of the best descriptions AI has ever had.)
     Jenna Renae was a klutzy pianist with a fantastic voice. "I'm so sorry - I just break things! It was an accident!"
     Mario Bonds was a high-energy blind black guy, and as Andy Griffith would say, he had a high roof to his mouth. The judges' rejections were extremely kindly worded.
     Adam Lasher fingerpicked his way through "Knockin' On Heaven's Door". His voice sounded cool.
     Emily Brooke sang a RaeLynn song called "Careless", which was interesting, since RaeLynn was a winner of The Voice, a member of one of Blake's teams. Anyway, Emily sang Carrie's "Blown Away" last year. It was a good imitation of RaeLynn's voice, but I'm not sure I would have let her through. It was nice guitar playing, though.

AI 15.4 Auditions - Denver/Little Rock

     It was back to Little Rock and Denver for last Thursday's episode of American Idol auditions, and frustratingly they still didn't show the DeSpain's neighbor.

     Season 9's Larry Platt (of "Pants On The Ground" fame) was mentioned in the opening sequence, which was awesome.

     Amber Lynn and James VIII were weird. She was wailing, and his guitar wasn't that great either. He looked a lot like the Grinch. But they let both of them through anyway. WHAT THE HECK?!
     Emily Weirs was an auctioneer(which of course meant John Michael Montgomery's song "Sold! (The Grundy County Auction Incident)" played in the background). She picked Jo Dee Messina's "Bring On the Rain" and did a great job, but she was awarded three "no"s. Again....WHAT THE HECK?!
     CJ Johnson was a professional musician from Memphis, his performance wasn't terrible, and almost cool, but not quite right. Sort of like Phillip Phillips meets Five for Fighting. They let him through, which I disagreed with.
     Switching back to Little Rock, it was Ethan Kuntz's turn. He was from Nashville, Arkansas, and he tried to stump everyone he met with locating it. (Wikipedia says it's in the southwest part of the state, and the high school teams are known as the "Scrappers".) "Sure, I know where Nashville, Arkansas is. Somewhere in Arkansas," Kris Allen laughed it off. His family raises hunting dogs, and his voice was pretty good, but it sure didn't match the rest of him.
     Mary Williams the horse trainer continued the string of "Being from some famous town....that was actually somewhere completely different", as she came from Belfast, Tennessee. She sang Tammy Wynette, which was fine, but very boring. And it was the first recorded use of TMM in my notebook this season(Too Much Makeup). "That was performed more than it was confessed. It wasn't a story," Keith complained.
     Going back to Denver, the judges got to shoot baskets with the Nuggets PA guy. That was funny. (JayLo won.) His name was Xavier Soller, and he tried singing "Friends in Low Places". It was awful. "I loved playing basketball with you, and I love that I won, but no." "Will you be OK?" Keith pounced on that pun immediately.
     Terrian Bass's hair was really unusual. It wasn't my style of music, and her voice was wrong for the song choice.
     Returning to Little Rock, a girl calling herself "Blue" was an Andy Dwyer-type of songwriter. And she had a ukelele. And a nose ring between her nostrils like a bull. She sang an awful improvised original song, and everyone was very relieved when she disappeared. "It kinda sounded like a Jewish prayer song..." Harry said, thinking.
     Thomas Stringfellow was from Bentonville, he had a terrible voice, but could play guitar well. He was about the eighth person this season to do Ed Sheeran's song "Give Me Love".
     And finally returning to Denver, we had TyWan Jackson the 300-pound dance instructor, who called himself "Tank". He also had a tiny stereo. "That is the smallest boom box I've ever seen," one of the guys said(I forget who). He did a Luther Vandross song called "Superstar", which actually sounded okay, until the shouting part that seems to be a requirement of Luther Vandross songs.
     A familiar face returned, it being the last season: John Wayne Schulz, aka the equally cool cowboy/Army flight instructor who lost the last spot in the finals of season 10 to Scotty McCreery(who won, of course). Turned out his mom had just gotten cancer back then, and if he would have gotten through then he would have missed her final months. So that probably turned out best. He sang Garth Brooks's "The Dance", and I just scrawled "YES." in capitals in my notebook. "You had such a natural way of doing it, it was so refreshing not to hear another Garth impression." Keith complimented him. "That was a perfect, succinct performance. I wanted to be at a campfire or something right there." - Harry. I also saw this clip shared on Facebook twice the next day outside of the AI page.
     Leah Herbert apparently learned to sing by playing a Britney Spears cassette on constant repeat. She did something by Aretha Franklin, and it was TERRIBLE. "Can we stop it, please?" JayLo begged. "Your voice leaves a lot of unanswered questions," Harry said. "You did really well at hiding Britney's influence," was all Keith said.
     Jordyn Simone was SO not 15. It sounded like something that would be part of a movie soundtrack; which isn't necessarily bad, just different. "Is there something higher than yes?" Keith wondered.
     Going back to Little Rock, they let Kassy Levels through without giving the audience any time to listen to her.
     Rhea Raj was a piano girl who they let through without really showing any of her performance.
    Jake Dillon was a plumber's apprentice from Sand Springs(Immediate bonus points!), and after they give him a hard time about that, Keith shakes his head. "You are so literal..." He then proceeds to sing "The Lucky One" by Kenny Loggins, which was awesome, reminding me a little of Eric Church. I wrote "YES!" in my notebook. Harry said no(WHAT THE HECK?!), Jennifer said yes, and so did Keith. "When we get to Hollywood, I'm gonna let Harry have it...one note at a time."
     Back to Denver, with a really weird girl named Ashley Adams-Soderbergh. (Proof: "I've been around the sun twenty times," was how she answered the question "How old are you?") She was okay, but it was weird. After a pause, Keith breaks the ice: "I liked the way you play guitar." "You don't fit in anywhere," Harry then tells her point-blank. (He was right, though.)
     Keith and Jennifer then have fun with accents.
     Russian Andrew was either extremely tall or extremely thin. He sang Garth Brooks's "To Make You Feel My Love", which came from the 1998 movie Hope Floats, which starred Harry. That was funny, in a strange way. He sounded pretty good, except for thinking it was a song from Adele.
     The final contestant of the night was Elvie Shane, who was a former druggie wearing an Amish hat. I don't much like "House of the Rising Sun", but he did a nice version of it.

AI 15.3 Auditions - Philadelphia

     Last Wednesday night the auditions came from Philadelphia, and it was a little disappointing.

     But still, it's American Idol, so that's something. And there's some nights that are just clunkers.

     The first contestant was Gianna Isabella, who was wearing something like a quilt, maybe? Or a nightgown? Anyway, her mom was a dance-pop star from the 80's. She sang "House of the Rising Sun", which is a weird song in the first place, but it seemed especially wrong for a girl to sing it. Her voice was okay. Keith acted very gentlemanly.
     Next was a guy named Derek who was awful. But he had a boombox, which was an AI first. "It's a yes for the boom box." - Keith.
     A farm kid named Isaac Cole McNanny was next. "So it's like an Irish babysitter," Keith explained to the other judges on how to pronounce his last name. He sang Lee Brice's "Love Like Crazy" extremely well, which impressed me. His hair was horrible, though.
     Sara Sturm reminded me a bit of Courtney's friend Libby. Her voice was better than I expected, singing some Meghan Trainor song, but she was just far too bouncy. It was a little overly Tigger-ish for me.
     Ellis Banks was a bizarre janitor singing "Born This Way" by Lady Gaga. The judges laughed him out of the room, as they should have.
     Jenn Blosil was extremely awkward. And not in a good way.... Like in a borderline terrifying way. Her voice wasn't terrible(she did "Radioactive" by Imagine Dragons), but I was very disappointed that the judges let her through. She reminded me of Brooke White from season 7, likely because she also listed her job as in child care(Brooke White was a nanny). JayLo called this audition "very compelling", while Keith was a bit stumped for what to say. "I spell my name with two N's whenever I don't add the -ifer." - JayLo.
      Harrison Cohen brought his grandpa along, and everyone had a blast with Grandpa's dating tips. "Don't be nervous. Consider this audition just as Tinder on steroids," Keith tried to loosen him up before the actual audition. He sang a really strange original song and they let him through. Then there was a dating montage, and JayLo explained to Keith what Grandpa's advice actually meant. (Apparently it was good; something about being sure to compliment whatever she's most insecure about herself.)
     The final contestant of the night was Jonathan Arthur Greene, who had a tragic backstory of accidentally shooting his older brother when he was eight. His voice was just all over the place, way too wild. It seemed too Broadway like. Plus it was Keith's song "Somebody Like You", which made it a little awkward. And the rhythm was off. But they let him through anyway.

     Though I don't usually care for crime-procedural shows, Aubrey Plaza was guest-starring on Criminal Minds right afterwards as a terrorist in a restaurant, which resulted in a couple well-written quips: "You're not sorry. 'Sorry' is what people are when they don't understand." - Kat Adams(Plaza). "Most hitmen are basically Swiss Army Knives of murder," - Spencer Reid.   

Ain't Eight Semesters Enough?

     The first week of my eighth semester of college is about halfway over. It'll be a long one, I think. There will be some good parts, but also a lot of screaming silently at the walls as I try to hammer out another sentence of an essay. (But it isn't like I don't have lots of practice with that, right?) Fiction Writing will likely be the best course. Topics of Advanced Comp will be difficult, but hopefully it won't be too bad. I'm not sure what to expect out of Studies in Poetry; it's basically everyone from Poetry Writing in fall, plus some other people. Scriptwriting will be informative, if nothing else... Also, this is the third semester in a row without a lunch break on Tuesday/Thursdays.
     Anyway, by next spring (I hope) I'll have graduated....
   
     Woke up this morning to Kenny Chesney's "Living in Fast Forward" playing as a Song of the Day, after waking up at least eight times the night before.

     I guess Alabama won the college football championship last night; I didn't pay any attention to the game because I was working on homework. Didn't pay any attention to Obama's State of the Union speech, either; though I considered counting the verbal missteps like Nano used to. Hopefully there'll be a parody of it on Saturday Night Live. 

     Also, the Rams are moving back to Los Angeles, which makes sense from a historical perspective, considering they were the first team out in California and stayed there for fifty years. But from another perspective, the idea of a pro football team in LA just sounds crazy. Facebook posts from St. Louis aren't too happy with this plan.

AI 15.2 Auditions - San Francisco/Little Rock

     It's time for the (very late) recap of the auditions in San Franscisco and Little Rock that were shown Thursday night. (But at least it's getting written before the next episode.) So we were in Tanner territory and smack dab in the middle of the Razorback pen. There were a lot of good voices, and some good quotes. And it was nice to have everybody circled around the TV again, and being able to debate contestants afterwards.

     Cameron Richard was a good story, overcoming that cleft palate, but his performance of an Ed Sheeran song called "Give Me Love" felt like it would have belonged better at a talent show. His voice didn't seem very developed yet at all. But they let him through anyway...
     Daniel with the Gigantic Crush on JayLo was better than I expected. He shouldn't have gotten through, I don't think, but the Tinder montage right after his audition was pretty funny.
     Dalton Rappatoni sang an incredible boring song("The Phantom of the Opera"?!), but his voice was decent. Trevor was extremely offended that he was wearing makeup.
     La'Porsha Renae had a HORRIBLE perm. It was cool seeing JayLo hold the baby, but it felt like this audition never ended. After eight million years, it finally did.
     Maddie the Farm Girl definitely made an impression....but what can you say to someone who introduces herself and her hen by saying "This chicken has the biggest breasts in Arkansas"? She didn't have a voice big enough to sing something of Carrie's. Also, there is no way "Cowboy Casanova" can ever be sung that slowly. "Umm.....you just sound so young," was all Harry could think of to say. The judges launching into the Green Acres theme song was hysterical.    
     Staying around the farm was Trent Harmon, but as he said during his intro, "You can sing to the cows all you want....but they still won't buy any albums." And so then he started singing....and I totally agreed with JayLo's "I can't even." "So was NOT expecting that...." - Keith. Trevor hated it. The memes afterward were entertaining.
     Switching out west to San Francisco, Brooke the Ditzy Apologizing Waitress was hilarious and highly quotable: "Shcrap....I'm sorry." "Most nights I go home smelling like ranch." She sang a Dixie Chicks song, it was all right.
     Olivia Rox had a really cool guitar, and the second thing I noticed about it was that her capo was set at 8. (That's extremely high.) She played piano well and seemed friendly and pretty in a Natalie Portman type of way, I would totally vote for her.
     Jessica the Witch was fine, in an "instantly forgetable" way.
     The girl named Ameet just got a "Meh...." in my notebook. "Is this American Idol, or is it American Bridal?" Keith wanted to know.
     Kayla looked terrifying. (I have no remembrance of this contestant.)
     Melanie Tierce with the "model eyes" was cute. And she had a really nice voice. And a pretty guitar.
     Miss Alaska Malie the radio host seemed like the wild edge of cool. She sang a Gretchen Wilson tune called "Chariot", which was weird-sounding. "It's like a dog fight with the girls this year. In your case I guess that'd be a husky fight....So, MUSH!" - Harry.
     Brandyn from St. Louis looked really familiar for some weird reason that none of us could figure out. He sang an original song that sounded like it was radio-ready right then. And then Harry snuck up behind him, which was hilarious enough, but then to hug him at the end, that was absolutely hysterical. (And it actually fit the lyric really well.) "I thought for a minute that was my mom..." Brandyn said. "Evidently his mom has very hairy arms," Keith commented once he'd left.
     Kyrsti Chavez was very Energetic. And clear, and Loud. "Mom and Dad are watching. How can I say no?" Harry asked. Her family was even funnier, though - "I just won the lottery...." when Ryan told him to go watch the audition from the inside. She shouldn't have been let through based on her voice, but Hollywood does need Personalities.
     Then there was some fortune cookie fun, and a great montage of overconfident contestants.
     Frenetic Sarah was truly awful, prattling on for nine minutes about the body being a temple(Harry interrupting with "What about my damn temple?!" was funny.) Then she infuriated Keith and most of America by slamming country music(yes, he does know who Miranda Lambert is - they're friends, and they teamed up for "We Were Us". Also, they filmed that video in Oklahoma City.) Anyway, Sarah was abrasive all the way through, and then she repeatedly forgot the lyrics. It was a good karoke voice. "You need to know the lyrics and be prepared. You kept saying, 'Oh, I messed up' and shooting yourself in the foot over and over. That sets up our expectations, which makes you even more unsettled....If you're auditioning, that is not the best way to do it. You don't seem ready for this at all." Keith just stated flatly. (Lots of cheers from our family room here.)     
     They brought us back to Little Rock for the end, as Tristan McIntosh closed out the show. (She looks a lot like Becky Sproles from Friday Night Lights.) She played piano well, and had a really interesting tone to her voice, which reminded me a bit of Sara Evans. And then her mom showing up, and they played Carrie's "So Small" over the whole scene....it was amazing! "I'm really happy right now," Tristan sobs. "I know I don't look like it but I am!" And so was the rest of America.
     The DeSpains' neighbor Kailey Abel was auditioning in Little Rock, and she got a Golden Ticket, too. They didn't show her audition, but I looked up some videos of her on YouTube, and she sounded pretty good.

     So after the first week of episodes, I'm pulling for Josiah, Lee Jean, Sonika, Reanna, Brooke, Olivia, Melanie, Brandyn and Tristan.

American Idol Farewell Premiere

     The fifteenth and final season of American Idol has started.

     That's really sad. And at the same time, wonderful. Last summer I wrote an in-depth post about what AI has meant, 

     But based on the first episode, it should hopefully go well. There were all these tweets reposted by the AI account from people like Kelly Clarkson and Carrie Underwood watching, and then plenty of fans, too. That was entertaining.
     I was watching with Trevor in the family room, which is exactly the same place we all experimented with this singing show during the first night of auditions in season 6. So that was a nice bit of symmetry.

     There were the debates and discussions with Annette and Sarah during rehearsals for the spring co-op play during season 6(which was actually a parody of Idol, adding to the fun). Then there was the email group with Mom, Damon, Trish, Mike and Vonda (and Clay!) for a couple years, adding greatly to the experience. Arguing with people on Webkinz during season 8, and then talking over episodes with Sam, Jon and Josh. I kept reviews for a while on here; watching season 12 alone in my frozen dorm room in Ross during my freshman year, then took a break for a couple seasons before returning.
     Me, Annette, Julie, Quinton and Alton were all planning on trying out at some point, but life kind of gets in the way of plans like that. 

      The  auditions started in Atlanta with a girl named Michelle, and she sang LeAnn Rimes's "Blue" pretty well. She was kind of annoying, but her voice was good enough to get one of those golden tickets. her family was watching on a couple of video monitors, and they all crashed into the audition room to rejoice, which was funny to see. A good bit of audition craziness they can use later in montages.
     Next was  Josiah Siska the Golf Cart Driver singing Johnny Cash; he did really well. Harry added sound effects to the performance, which was funny. And then the guy's mom asked him to sing a Beauty and the Beast song in the car on the way home, which was perfect. (That's a great movie. I need to watch it again.)
     Lindita the personal trainer wasn't my style of music, but she sounded fine. I was okay with the judges letting her though; Trevor squawked at this decision. Also, I don't really care if you have lost a ton of weight in your inspiring journey to the audition room or whatever....but they do need some of those types of stories to fill space.
     Keith hopping in place to reduce stiffness was really hilarious. And his "Do you think this would be distracting?" And then Harry was being an intimidating statue in the corner and JayLo lounged on the table. Billy Bob the hillbilly was a good colorful contestant, but they were totally right, his voice was way too inconsistent to advance. But he could play guitar. And singing Waylon Jennings was a cool touch.
     Lee Jean was a friendly teenager from New Orleans, and he was pretty good. He did an Ed Sheeran song, and he can play guitar really well, too! I was glad he advanced.
     The show then shifted to Denver, where our first Colorado contestant was Jeneve Rose Mitchell, a cowgirl who lives on a ranch without electricity. Idol is about the only show they watch, and they fire up a generator to power the TV. Her voice wasn't that great, but it was decent. And it's really rare that you see someone play a cello. Especially a bluegrass cello, while singing. It made for a bewildering rendition of The Band Perry's "Chainsaw", but it was a pleasant type of strangeness. (Unlike this bluegrass version of Miranda Lambert's "Gunpowder and Lead", which was bizarrely upbeat.)
     Sonika Vaid from Massachusetts did an amazing cover of one of Carrie's early songs And Ryan's comment to her dad was great: "Hey, listen, next time we FaceTime, do your hair."
     Joseph  Kohlruss from Arizona was awful, and somehow pitiful. But we need those people the audience can laugh at.
     Reanna the police officer was really good. And the bit where she handcuffed Harry was really entertaining. She sang a Patsy Cline breakup song, where Harry commented, "You're talkin' about leaving, and I'm like, I know! I can't move!" And just as she's leaving, Keith asks what else she has up her sleeve of tricks. "I have a Taser," she replies instantly, deadpan.
     Sylvia the Talker from Georgia was hysterical. And that was some LOUD YODELING. Also, the intro of inspiring stories was just perfect. I was like, "Hey, yeah, I remember him! And her! Hey, there's Lazaro! He was great!" And then Ryan's voiceover, "This next contestant....isn't any of those things." They rejected her really politely, though; Keith was like, "I love your accent, I could listen to you tell stories all day." "My favorite part of when she talked about the show goat Jim," Harry added after she'd left.
     Shevonne was okay, not great.
     Kory Wheeler was a no from me, but they let him through.
     Lauren was a definite no for me, her voice was just too weak. But the judges singing the Laverne & Shirley theme song was pretty awesome.
     Going back to Atlanta, Joshua Wicker wasn't my style of music, but he was okay. His pregnant wife meeting Harry was a nice story. He was "compelling," according to Keith, and JayLo said that his voice had "a lot of pretty colors in it."
     Jordan & Alex Sasser were....interesting. They were husband and wife, with their little daughter, and she played a pink ukelele. It was a little too fast, but kind of catchy. The song was Bruno Mars, "Count On Me", I think it's called? What Mrs. Boyer and Jed based the SGYC Camp Song on. Keith thought it was "too light, everything seemed to be just on the surface." He was too Broadway, and singing Celine Dion? Really? They let him through, not her. That led to some wedded drama afterwards.
     Going back to Denver, there was this painfully earnest homeschooled guy named Kerry whose mom died of cancer. It was fine, I guess, but a no from me. And he was weird looking. JayLo said that his performance was "kind of quirky, but also kind of dark and a little scary." Yet they let him through anyway. Really, guys?
     Alabama Shelbie was an irritating hairdresser. She did Carrie's "Last Name". It wasn't terrible, but she was SHOUTING SO MUCH. It was just far too LOUD.... But they let her through.
      Kanye West surprising the judges was entertaining.  

Opening the New Year

     Music is helpful to do homework by. So I've built a lot of playlists on my Spotify channels. Putting them on "shuffle" mode, going by station, the first songs played this year were the following: from the lengthy Story Songs collection it was Brad Paisley's "Part Two", from the 80's it was "Knockin' on Heaven's Door" by Guns N Roses, while the first song from the 90's/2000's playlist was Eli's "Stand", CHRISTMAS was playing Love Handel's version of "Santa Claus is Comin' to Town" and StayAwake was playing Owl City's "Speed of Love".
     Pandora stations, CHRISTMAS! featured Brad Paisley's rendution of "Silver Bells", Comedy and Laughter played Andy Griffith's wonderful monologue "What It Was, Was Football", Michael W. Smith's "Breathe" was the first dose of Decent Christian Music, while the DJ over at Everything 93.5 played Scotty McCreery's "See You Tonight", Family Road Trip Radio had the Temptations singing "Ain't Too Proud to Beg", and Movies and Musicals was playing Owl City's "Hello Seattle" for some reason. Boston's autobiographical "Rock and Roll Band" was heard when flipping the dial over to Sports, "The Dance" by Garth Brooks was heard on Square Dance!, Study Aids was playing MercyMe's "I Can Only Imagine", and the folks at This is Country Music were playing "I'm Already There", by Lonestar.  
     The titles of my Spotify channels are much more practical and boring, as compared to the names of the Pandora stations.

     Glory was the first cat to decide to pounce on my bed to take a nap; then helped type those above paragraphs. And then she and Rags and Darcy got into a big fight last night. Rags helped me finish this post.

     Watched the NHL's Winter Classic yesterday afternoon; the Canadiens pounded the Bruins 5-1 at the Patriots' stadium. But hockey is Canada's game, so it wasn't too big a deal. Besides, I never have much liked Boston, anyway. Dad listened to the Sugar Bowl on the radio as Ole Miss destroyed OSU.
     Caleb went to the gun range with Mom and Dad, they all had a good time.

     Courtney, Trevor, Dad and I went to go see The Force Awakens finally  Star Wars is very much its own thing, so I'm not sure what how to classify it. Courtney and Dad loved it.
     The new movie chronology renders most of the novels nonexistent, which is irritating, because some of them were pretty good. (There's one by James Luceno that is simply tracing the history of the Milennium Falcon.) But anyway, you get a rough idea of what happened to everyone, and then - blam! Erased away with Episode VII. Technically, they now take place in an alternate universe, which seems like a flimsy copout, but whatever.
     Glad to have watched it now, since Star Wars is basically the pop-culture version of the Super Bowl.